3 ms·

He means people, not objectified people. I assume his statement was only meant to apply to people you know or meet in real life.

JoeAltmaier 15y ago
So, if I met Angelina Jolie I wouldn't be attracted to her? Nonsense!
- wpietri 15y ago
  If you were Angelina Jolie's neighbor and ran into her a couple times a day, then yes, you would stop being attracted to her eventually. That's partly because you're attracted to a cartoon. A star's media image is very carefully crafted. People like that are much less impressive in person. And that's partly because Lazare is right. You can be eternally attracted to a media image because there's a broken feedback loop. If you were displaying your attraction to an actual person, you'd be getting either positive or negative feedback. Eventually things would either heat up or cool down. Think about all the people you know that you once felt strong sexual attraction for. How many of them do you still feel that way about? For me, the percentage is tiny.
  - JoeAltmaier 15y ago
    I'm pretty good at keeping the cartoon in mind, even after knowing someone. Its called fantasizing, its pretty common, and it refutes the author's nonsense about not being attracted to someone who is not attracted to you.
    - wpietri 15y ago
      Hrm. In my view, that's still being attracted to the cartoon, not the person. If you paste somebody's face on a blow-up doll and have sex with that, you still haven't had sex with the person. That you confuse your fantasy character with a real person doesn't make the fantasy relationship more real. Also: continuing to display attraction signals to somebody who isn't interested in you? That comes across as creepy. As would fantasizing about someone you know who doesn't find you attractive. For your sake, I hope they don't find out. If the author's black-and-white statement still is bothering you, go ahead and insert some nuance. E.g., "normally" or "for non-creepy people".
      - JoeAltmaier 15y ago
        Wait! There's a huge, insulting assumption in there (or two). Perhaps I'm attracted to her genuine concern for 3rd world peoples, impressed by her large, loving non-standard family and in agreement with her political views! The sex thing is just, you know, gravy.
    - Apocryphon 15y ago
      I think we're dealing with different kinds of attraction here.

JoeAltmaier 15y ago

So, if I met Angelina Jolie I wouldn't be attracted to her? Nonsense!

wpietri 15y ago
If you were Angelina Jolie's neighbor and ran into her a couple times a day, then yes, you would stop being attracted to her eventually. That's partly because you're attracted to a cartoon. A star's media image is very carefully crafted. People like that are much less impressive in person. And that's partly because Lazare is right. You can be eternally attracted to a media image because there's a broken feedback loop. If you were displaying your attraction to an actual person, you'd be getting either positive or negative feedback. Eventually things would either heat up or cool down. Think about all the people you know that you once felt strong sexual attraction for. How many of them do you still feel that way about? For me, the percentage is tiny.
- JoeAltmaier 15y ago
  I'm pretty good at keeping the cartoon in mind, even after knowing someone. Its called fantasizing, its pretty common, and it refutes the author's nonsense about not being attracted to someone who is not attracted to you.
  - wpietri 15y ago
    Hrm. In my view, that's still being attracted to the cartoon, not the person. If you paste somebody's face on a blow-up doll and have sex with that, you still haven't had sex with the person. That you confuse your fantasy character with a real person doesn't make the fantasy relationship more real. Also: continuing to display attraction signals to somebody who isn't interested in you? That comes across as creepy. As would fantasizing about someone you know who doesn't find you attractive. For your sake, I hope they don't find out. If the author's black-and-white statement still is bothering you, go ahead and insert some nuance. E.g., "normally" or "for non-creepy people".
    - JoeAltmaier 15y ago
      Wait! There's a huge, insulting assumption in there (or two). Perhaps I'm attracted to her genuine concern for 3rd world peoples, impressed by her large, loving non-standard family and in agreement with her political views! The sex thing is just, you know, gravy.
  - Apocryphon 15y ago
    I think we're dealing with different kinds of attraction here.