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Your #2 is one of the most important items, I think. I've been coding for -- holy crap I just did the math -- 46 years. I've been around computers almost my en

Your #2 is one of the most important items, I think. I've been coding for -- holy crap I just did the math -- 46 years. I've been around computers almost my entire life, and like anyone with a similar background, I have a very deep understanding of what goes on behind the scenes and a strong intuition of how to use unfamiliar interfaces. My wife, on the other hand, uses computers only because she has to. Whenever she has a problem, I always coach her through the solution if I can. I only take over if the solution is so arcane that she will never need to remember it (e.g. driver configurations). Coaching her reinforces her memory of the solution, and I also explain why she is doing each step if I can. It's really basic learning theory: Providing background information on the problem and solution will help them understand. Allowing them to perform the task instead of just watching someone else reinforces learning as well. For bonus points, they also feel much more in control of the situation and they won't feel "talked down to" (at least not as much, or as often).

slapo 3y ago
I generally agree with the article, jdblair's parent post and your post. However, I also found that while there are people who are happy to learn and have stuff explained to them, be it related to computers, making bread from scratch or just about anything else, there are also people who just want things to be done for them, because they hate doing things they aren't well acquainted with themselves. When I was a teen, until almost my mid-twenties, I've had mostly neighbours and my parents' friends or acquaintances ask for help to sort out their computer related problems they, or, most often, help was offered by my parents in my stead without me knowing about it until it would be too rude for me to refuse. Most of them wanted the problem fixed in that particular instance to make it go away and just keep their fingers crossed that it wouldn't reoccur. I would usually offer that I'd try to teach them if it was something fairly simple. But then it would usually turn out that they only really agreed to appear polite. Most of them didn't care and looked mortified when I asked them to use the mouse and keyboard themselves after doing a demo so they could try it themselves. There was maybe one person who tried taking notes. Few asked questions, and most of the time, it had to be me to "goad" the questions or feedback out of them. Sometimes, this was because they were just anxious, but mostly, it quickly became clear I was beating a dead horse and they weren't really interested and I would usually not be able to motivate them. Eventually, I asked my parents to stop it and now if someone asks for my help and it isn't something complex, I only agree to help if they'd agree to learn in most cases, or if they consider it an emergency.

slapo 3y ago

I generally agree with the article, jdblair's parent post and your post. However, I also found that while there are people who are happy to learn and have stuff explained to them, be it related to computers, making bread from scratch or just about anything else, there are also people who just want things to be done for them, because they hate doing things they aren't well acquainted with themselves. When I was a teen, until almost my mid-twenties, I've had mostly neighbours and my parents' friends or acquaintances ask for help to sort out their computer related problems they, or, most often, help was offered by my parents in my stead without me knowing about it until it would be too rude for me to refuse. Most of them wanted the problem fixed in that particular instance to make it go away and just keep their fingers crossed that it wouldn't reoccur. I would usually offer that I'd try to teach them if it was something fairly simple. But then it would usually turn out that they only really agreed to appear polite. Most of them didn't care and looked mortified when I asked them to use the mouse and keyboard themselves after doing a demo so they could try it themselves. There was maybe one person who tried taking notes. Few asked questions, and most of the time, it had to be me to "goad" the questions or feedback out of them. Sometimes, this was because they were just anxious, but mostly, it quickly became clear I was beating a dead horse and they weren't really interested and I would usually not be able to motivate them. Eventually, I asked my parents to stop it and now if someone asks for my help and it isn't something complex, I only agree to help if they'd agree to learn in most cases, or if they consider it an emergency.