We came to a similar conclusion and my wife wanted to stay home with the kids. Her income, when taxed at our full marginal tax rate, would have otherwise been n

We came to a similar conclusion and my wife wanted to stay home with the kids. Her income, when taxed at our full marginal tax rate, would have otherwise been nearly completely consumed by childcare and other costs we could avoid if she worked on the household. So, we lost 5 years of her 401k contributions in exchange for her getting what she preferred, what the kids enjoyed, and a lot more meals at home as a family. That trade was well-worth it.