3 ms·
> It is a pretty well documented phenomenon that men with average or below average height are largely excluded from online dating activity. In real life dating
by mettamage 3y ago
> It is a pretty well documented phenomenon that men with average or below average height are largely excluded from online dating activity. In real life dating of course height is much less of a factor, but for online dating it very much is.
I'm not short, but the way I'd go around it is to falsely advertise my height and charm them on the dates. Unethical? Not from a utilitarianistic standpoint if I find my partner through such a lie (the fact that a few dates had to travel to be conned versus years/a lifetime of happiness of two people doesn't compare). Moreover, I'd rather view at is being a rebel against a culture that seems to exclude short men. Given my experience about editing my pictures to make myself look more attractive (and not getting any shit about it), I think I could make it work. There's a sweet spot where you can lie a bit and not get any issues with it.
Note: during the first date I stop with any charades I was playing online. Why? Because the weird contortions of online dating are gone. I'm seeing a real person now and she is seeing me in real life too. In reality, I'm honest to a fault with people. However, when it comes to chatting to strangers on dating apps, that's a big exception with some select things (such as how attractive I look or if I'd be short how tall I am). Toxic environments unfortunately need measures that I'd view as terribly toxic in any other circumstance. People that give me an actual fair chance (or are clearly acting based on good faith) get the whole truth. Anyone else doesn't deserve it.
The attraction phase of dating sure is different than any other phase. In certain ways it is its inverse (it mostly isn't though, it's mostly the same but some subsections are inversed).