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> Teenagers have long balked at telling parents where they are. Parents and kids are much less adversarial than they once seemed to be. Add in both increased

> Teenagers have long balked at telling parents where they are. Parents and kids are much less adversarial than they once seemed to be. Add in both increased societal acceptance of certain activities (sex, drugs, and drinking) as well as enormous reductions in those activities among teenagers and you get happy life integrations and life support such as this, rather than your parents wondering whether you are in an unpleasant situation and you wondering how to get out of it.

rogerkirkness 3y ago
I agree with this. Gen X parents seem worried their kids are too well adjusted to do fun things before adulthood starts.
- pixl97 3y ago
  As a Gen X parent we realize it's also problematic that anything a kid does can now be forever. I mean, technically back in the day there was always some multi-million to one chance you could do something that could end up documented forever in history, but most kids didn't think of that. These days every single kid knows of another kid that had a video taken of them doing something dumb. They see this content can end up online. They are warned by their parents that this could follow them forever. This issues are not reconcilable. You cannot both grow up and make mistakes and have your mistakes potentially documented to the world forever. So what gives are the young generations behaviors.
adastra22 3y ago
Parent here, I’m also surprised by this. I would have been horrified at my boomer parents tracking me by a wearable device. My daughter, on the other hand, gets anxious when she leaves her Apple Watch at home, because without it I can’t track her. I will say that it started when there was a gun scare at her school. She used the watch to text me that they were in lockdown, and I used it to track her as I rushed to school. So I guess it’s a lifeline connection for her? That’s something my generation didn’t have to deal with (Columbine was during my last years in school).
- dleslie 3y ago
  Also a parent; my kids feel much the same. They feel safe and comforted by us; and I think much of it has to do with the way many parents choose to approach parenting. At least for myself and my partner, it's not the discipline-first approach we were raised with, it's far more of a _socratic_ dialogue with our kids. We openly explore why things are being done the way they are, why there are certain expectations. It's as much about understanding as it is about helping them feel like they have some measure of influence, control, and responsibility over themselves. And then I see the kids of parents who take a more traditional approach, and those are the kids that are dodging their parents' oversight, and acting out at school, and generally trying to find a way to assert or discover some feeling of control and responsibility in their life.
  - zdragnar 3y ago
    I'm right between gen x and millennial. My parents never spanked or yelled. Discipline, when required, was a conversation. As a teenager, I wouldn't have wanted to be tracked, except when I went on long (20+ mile) bike rides through the countryside, and that would only have been because I went alone. On trips to town or spending time with friends, that would have felt like a millstone. There's definitely more to it than parenting style.
    - pixl97 3y ago
      Right around the same age, maybe a year or two older. Your parents most likely watched the news at 6 and 10, it wasn't long after this news became a 24 hour thing for almost everyone. Then a personal thing as you were getting news on a device on your body at all hours. Toss in a little 9/11 of America getting attacked, and between the two we've created a culture that is a lot more afraid.
      - zdragnar 3y ago
        That was pretty much my point- parenting style isn't enough to explain the difference. Then again, I grew up in Wisconsin, which had to go through all the coverage of Jeffery Dahmer. Stranger Danger was a very real thing for a lot of people.
jstarfish 3y ago
> Parents and kids are much less adversarial than they once seemed to be. [...] Add in both increased societal acceptance of certain activities (sex, drugs, and drinking) as well as enormous reductions in those activities among teenagers Not my experience, not what I see in my family and not what I see in neighbors' kids either. Every single parent I associate with has a kid that has weaponized CPS or other false abuse claims to keep parents in check. I've even been duped into calling them myself. Now when the neighbor's kid takes a domestic dispute into the street, I know what game he's playing. They're also fragmenting their families with "___ makes me uncomfortable" verbiage that vaguely alludes to molestation or other crimes that they never seem willing to expand on when pressed. I swear this is a shared playbook or something (Casey Anthony? Freddy Got Fingered?); everybody started doing it all at once. "You're not respecting my feelings" is another popular guilt tactic they exploit on gullible parents. Your feelings never matter quite as much as theirs though. Textbook example of mini-spouse syndrome. Thankfully people started seeing through the "give me $40k for a sex change or I'll kill myself" hostage-taking ruse, especially when they didn't follow through after fundraising. Some turn to just killing their parents to inherit early and avoid accountability. But "they say this never happens." Hard to be much of a parent when you constantly have therapists, social workers and idiot grandparents hounding you about why you did ___ to smol babby Uwu. The best part of course is getting fed up and kicking them out...once they moan about that on social media and blast the rest of the family, now you're even more of a villain. Every kid is an oppressed LGBT these days...a free mob comes with every membership. It's real easy to get along with people once you've crybullied or humiliated them into submission.
- the_third_wave 3y ago
  If I may be so bold as to ask: where do you live? What place is it where all children are manipulative sociopaths in the making? I assume it is somewhere in the USA which seems to be the epicentre of the identity politics infestation but the way you describe it here seems like the situation is far worse than expected. Every child has weaponised CPS? Did any of them around you kill their parents to inherit early?

rogerkirkness 3y ago

I agree with this. Gen X parents seem worried their kids are too well adjusted to do fun things before adulthood starts.

pixl97 3y ago
As a Gen X parent we realize it's also problematic that anything a kid does can now be forever. I mean, technically back in the day there was always some multi-million to one chance you could do something that could end up documented forever in history, but most kids didn't think of that. These days every single kid knows of another kid that had a video taken of them doing something dumb. They see this content can end up online. They are warned by their parents that this could follow them forever. This issues are not reconcilable. You cannot both grow up and make mistakes and have your mistakes potentially documented to the world forever. So what gives are the young generations behaviors.

adastra22 3y ago

Parent here, I’m also surprised by this. I would have been horrified at my boomer parents tracking me by a wearable device. My daughter, on the other hand, gets anxious when she leaves her Apple Watch at home, because without it I can’t track her. I will say that it started when there was a gun scare at her school. She used the watch to text me that they were in lockdown, and I used it to track her as I rushed to school. So I guess it’s a lifeline connection for her? That’s something my generation didn’t have to deal with (Columbine was during my last years in school).

dleslie 3y ago
Also a parent; my kids feel much the same. They feel safe and comforted by us; and I think much of it has to do with the way many parents choose to approach parenting. At least for myself and my partner, it's not the discipline-first approach we were raised with, it's far more of a _socratic_ dialogue with our kids. We openly explore why things are being done the way they are, why there are certain expectations. It's as much about understanding as it is about helping them feel like they have some measure of influence, control, and responsibility over themselves. And then I see the kids of parents who take a more traditional approach, and those are the kids that are dodging their parents' oversight, and acting out at school, and generally trying to find a way to assert or discover some feeling of control and responsibility in their life.
- zdragnar 3y ago
  I'm right between gen x and millennial. My parents never spanked or yelled. Discipline, when required, was a conversation. As a teenager, I wouldn't have wanted to be tracked, except when I went on long (20+ mile) bike rides through the countryside, and that would only have been because I went alone. On trips to town or spending time with friends, that would have felt like a millstone. There's definitely more to it than parenting style.
  - pixl97 3y ago
    Right around the same age, maybe a year or two older. Your parents most likely watched the news at 6 and 10, it wasn't long after this news became a 24 hour thing for almost everyone. Then a personal thing as you were getting news on a device on your body at all hours. Toss in a little 9/11 of America getting attacked, and between the two we've created a culture that is a lot more afraid.
    - zdragnar 3y ago
      That was pretty much my point- parenting style isn't enough to explain the difference. Then again, I grew up in Wisconsin, which had to go through all the coverage of Jeffery Dahmer. Stranger Danger was a very real thing for a lot of people.

jstarfish 3y ago

> Parents and kids are much less adversarial than they once seemed to be. [...] Add in both increased societal acceptance of certain activities (sex, drugs, and drinking) as well as enormous reductions in those activities among teenagers Not my experience, not what I see in my family and not what I see in neighbors' kids either. Every single parent I associate with has a kid that has weaponized CPS or other false abuse claims to keep parents in check. I've even been duped into calling them myself. Now when the neighbor's kid takes a domestic dispute into the street, I know what game he's playing. They're also fragmenting their families with "___ makes me uncomfortable" verbiage that vaguely alludes to molestation or other crimes that they never seem willing to expand on when pressed. I swear this is a shared playbook or something (Casey Anthony? Freddy Got Fingered?); everybody started doing it all at once. "You're not respecting my feelings" is another popular guilt tactic they exploit on gullible parents. Your feelings never matter quite as much as theirs though. Textbook example of mini-spouse syndrome. Thankfully people started seeing through the "give me $40k for a sex change or I'll kill myself" hostage-taking ruse, especially when they didn't follow through after fundraising. Some turn to just killing their parents to inherit early and avoid accountability. But "they say this never happens." Hard to be much of a parent when you constantly have therapists, social workers and idiot grandparents hounding you about why you did ___ to smol babby Uwu. The best part of course is getting fed up and kicking them out...once they moan about that on social media and blast the rest of the family, now you're even more of a villain. Every kid is an oppressed LGBT these days...a free mob comes with every membership. It's real easy to get along with people once you've crybullied or humiliated them into submission.

the_third_wave 3y ago
If I may be so bold as to ask: where do you live? What place is it where all children are manipulative sociopaths in the making? I assume it is somewhere in the USA which seems to be the epicentre of the identity politics infestation but the way you describe it here seems like the situation is far worse than expected. Every child has weaponised CPS? Did any of them around you kill their parents to inherit early?