I don't know what jabber.ru's policy is, it's running a very old version of ejabberd. But you would be hard-pressed to find an XMPP server that would allow auth

I don't know what jabber.ru's policy is, it's running a very old version of ejabberd. But you would be hard-pressed to find an XMPP server that would allow authentication without TLS. Starttls makes no difference.