4 ms·

It seems like everyone is angry lately. We're not hanging out anymore because people have gone nuts. Everyone is scary as hell.

gspencley 3y ago
Only online. Although I've never been a huge fan of social media, I do have accounts to keep in touch with relatives and promote things that I make and produce. But I've really toned down my usage lately because I find that everything online seems designed to provoke some kind of outrage. Even if we ignore news and media, and "rage bait" headlines, consider when and why people turn to comment sections and social media in general. People are there to unwind, de-stress and share recipes and cat gifs. That is their motivation. But WHEN do people do that? Typically on a break or after a long day of work or when the kids have finally fallen asleep. So most people are already in an agitated state to begin with. Then they read something that annoys them, or they have something from work to vent about. And so not only does everyone seem angry, they were a bit on edge to begin with and then created a feedback cycle through mutual participation. I personally started to feel so much less anxious and uptight when I started to use social media and read comments less. Same with most news, but I won't begrudge anyone for trying to keep informed. It's really the angry feedback cycle that I think is creating a lot of stress and anxiety for people.
erulabs 3y ago
I am currently avoiding two relatives because they're always so upset. I agree with them almost entirely, but I don't want to be around people who are apoplectic. Yes, war is bad, but please just stop yelling at me just because I'm the only one in the room making eye contact! "The Problem" is hyperbole. I've never wanted to defend something awful more than after having to hear an hour long angry rant, even when I agree.
adamrezich 3y ago
my only hope is that eventually everyone will become as tired of performative anger as a means of influencing others as I have been for years now. however, as of now, the trend still seems to be going in the opposite direction, on the surface at least.
- csours 3y ago
  An approach to think about: If someone is making you angry, they are controlling you. I haven't really tried that in the real world, and I don't think you can phrase it exactly like that to someone who is angry in the moment, it will just make them more angry. But if you have a loved one who is being controlled by someone else's anger, it may be worth thinking about how you might communicate the idea.

gspencley 3y ago

Only online. Although I've never been a huge fan of social media, I do have accounts to keep in touch with relatives and promote things that I make and produce. But I've really toned down my usage lately because I find that everything online seems designed to provoke some kind of outrage. Even if we ignore news and media, and "rage bait" headlines, consider when and why people turn to comment sections and social media in general. People are there to unwind, de-stress and share recipes and cat gifs. That is their motivation. But WHEN do people do that? Typically on a break or after a long day of work or when the kids have finally fallen asleep. So most people are already in an agitated state to begin with. Then they read something that annoys them, or they have something from work to vent about. And so not only does everyone seem angry, they were a bit on edge to begin with and then created a feedback cycle through mutual participation. I personally started to feel so much less anxious and uptight when I started to use social media and read comments less. Same with most news, but I won't begrudge anyone for trying to keep informed. It's really the angry feedback cycle that I think is creating a lot of stress and anxiety for people.

erulabs 3y ago

I am currently avoiding two relatives because they're always so upset. I agree with them almost entirely, but I don't want to be around people who are apoplectic. Yes, war is bad, but please just stop yelling at me just because I'm the only one in the room making eye contact! "The Problem" is hyperbole. I've never wanted to defend something awful more than after having to hear an hour long angry rant, even when I agree.

adamrezich 3y ago

my only hope is that eventually everyone will become as tired of performative anger as a means of influencing others as I have been for years now. however, as of now, the trend still seems to be going in the opposite direction, on the surface at least.

csours 3y ago
An approach to think about: If someone is making you angry, they are controlling you. I haven't really tried that in the real world, and I don't think you can phrase it exactly like that to someone who is angry in the moment, it will just make them more angry. But if you have a loved one who is being controlled by someone else's anger, it may be worth thinking about how you might communicate the idea.