I think that's the truly rotten thing about social media. They need you to interact with it in pursuit of their business goals, instead of letting people drive

I think that's the truly rotten thing about social media. They need you to interact with it in pursuit of their business goals, instead of letting people drive social dynamics themselves. It's less "social" and more "consumption." By contrast, a private group chat is entirely driven by its participants and the social expectations between them. A private group chat won't say "hey, we recommend you add X, Y, and Z randos!" or try to commodify your social ties.