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They jest, but I see a business opportunity here if someone were so bold. The new Amazon EV trucks could be modified to have an electric urine collection syste
by LinuxBender 3y ago
They jest, but I see a business opportunity here if someone were so bold. The new Amazon EV trucks could be modified to have an electric urine collection system and collect the urine in a large tank under the vehicle whilst it is in motion. While collecting the suction motors pulsate to the song wagie cagie [1]. Upon return to the warehouse the vehicle could couple with a set of connectors that charges up the batteries and drains the urine collection tank. That urine could be processed to separate out the Urea and sold to the companies that produce Diesel Exhaust Fluid. The separation machine is powered by employees on their break time stepping on peddles to get exercise. The remaining chloride, sodium, potassium, creatinine could be processed and sold on Amazon as "Completely natural supplements" branded as "Amazon Heart Healthy" with the drivers ID number on the ingredients ~Edit out: giving them a portion of the profits~. The bilirubin could be sold as antioxidants to prevent endothelial cell injury. The marketing options are limitless.
I jest but when evil corps give you lemons...
[Edit] - I forgot to add the link to the song. It's 30 minutes but the pumps will just keep extracting.
[1] - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRzxpIa6U8o https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRzxpIa6U8o [video][30 mins][metal]
- diggan 3y agoI was with you until the whole "giving them a portion of the profits" part. New processes need to capture the full value of the employees, not give them pieces of it. This is part of AMZN Management 101, looks like someone didn't pay attention in the employee onboarding.
- HappySweeney 3y agoI don't know when you attended, but now you are supposed to charge the driver for each relief event.
- LinuxBender 3y agoFair enough, I will return for remedial re-education after I complete my social media training.
- geodel 3y ago> I jest but when evil corps give you lemons... Or maybe Urinade is the idea whose time has come. Finally a powerful energy drink that peak performers deserve.
- FooBarBizBazz 3y agoLike POCARI SWEAT...
- itronitron 3y agoTheir tagline could be 'it's not lemonade'
- CharleFKane 3y agoIt's got electrolytes.
- JTbane 3y agoDiesel exhaust fluid is just urea + water. I see a business opportunity for truckers looking to save a few bucks.
- cdchn 3y agoReplenish the DEF for trucks that supply the Amazon warehouses. Synergy.
- throw478495 3y agoI get the joke, but.. Chinese Cultural Revolution already prosecuted people who did not produce enough poop to fertilize fields. This already happened! And 70% of males in US very violently attacked while they were infants to have big parts of their genitals removed! Those genitals were used as a skin care product for rich! This joke is just too real to be funny!
- gumby 3y ago> Those genitals were used as a skin care product for rich! This is true. All those fancy ladies getting collagen injection into their lips don’t realize where the collagen came from. Allergan’s strain was cultured from the discarded foreskin from a single boy about 27 years ago.
- at_a_remove 3y agoI would like to know more about the CCP fertilizer business, with sources. I keep running up against an astonishing ignorance from the younger generations about some of the excesses of these sorts of groups just as they bemoan "late stage capitalism."
- 4ggr0 3y agoJust to be clear, when people bemoan late stage capitalism it doesn't mean that they also all like and appreciate CCP/Mao/Stalin etc. One can be anti-capitalist without being pro-authoritarian communism.
- CamperBob2 3y agoAt some point there's an implicit obligation to suggest something better, rather than just complain.
- 4ggr0 3y agoYou think anti-(fascist-)capitalists have no better suggestions than dictators from 40+ years ago?
- hulitu 3y agoThey will just use it to deny compensation based on the substances they found.
- tossit444 3y agoto those who don't know the song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBVggGXGxxc https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBVggGXGxxc
- morkalork 3y agoThanks I had no idea what they were referencing. Is the image used for the wagie cage from a real patent application?
- LinuxBender 3y agoGood point. Here is the Extended Version [1] used in ℌ𝔢𝔩𝔩 𝔚𝔬𝔯𝔩𝔡 4 that YT censored [1] - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRzxpIa6U8o https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IRzxpIa6U8o [video][30 mins][metal]
- 1970-01-01 3y agoYou jest because it is too soon. Take the driver's urine and separate it for urea. As the van moves through heavy stop and go traffic in Europe, spray out the urea. So the EV is not only a zero emission delivery van but also a NOx scrubber. Drip the remaining urine components out as you drive along. It is Europe, after all. :P https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPM40ey1OHQ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPM40ey1OHQ
- zikduruqe 3y agoFound Dave Matthew's HN account. https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2022/08/08/dave-matthews-band-tour-bus-poop-chicago-boat/10269659002/ https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2022/08/08/dave-m...
- kamarg 3y ago> he separation machine is powered by employees on their break time Did they finally allow warehouse workers actual break time? Weren't they were peeing in bottles or something for a while because they didn't have time for breaks while still making quotas?
- LinuxBender 3y agoI don't know but I did buy a powerful black light to check my packages.
- ksherlock 3y agoAnother good business opportunity: some truck drivers use stimulants. Some of those stimulants will end up in the urine, where they can be extracted and re-sold. During WWII, there was a limited supply of penicillin (discovered in 1928 but not used on humans until 1941/1942). Since ~99% is excreted in the urine, it was collected, cleaned up, and re-used.
- gumby 3y agoInstead of penalising employees for too many bathroom breaks you’ll be punished for too few. But no free water for you; you’ll have to buy water. Perhaps you’ll be able to take it off your taxes, at least.