2 ms·

A negative thought is just a thought, it's not like you need to actively not take care of real life things or errands. But if you find yourself thinking about d

by vasco 3y ago

A negative thought is just a thought, it's not like you need to actively not take care of real life things or errands. But if you find yourself thinking about death, or about how much your childhood sucked, or that you're good for nothing, you don't need to address anything about those thoughts. The least time you spend on them the better, nothing good comes from dwelling. I can't understand people that want to re-live or push through some negative thoughts "because it'll get better eventually". To me it seems like you're just making yourself numb, and it's got to be at the expense or something. You become so beaten down from them they don't hurt you anymore. I'd rather just not think about bad stuff, they come my away and I go away from them and I get to keep my "mental innocence". Why go through a long road when there's an immediate escape hatch? Said in a similar way, I could prepare for bad things to come. I know my parents will die. Should I think about that non-stop and feel sad everyday I do it just so I'll feel less sad when they die? Sounds ridiculous. I have zero desire to "understand" why some thoughts come sometimes, I just want to move past them as fast as possible.

zozbot234 3y ago
> But if you find yourself thinking about death, or about how much your childhood sucked, or that you're good for nothing, you don't need to address anything about those thoughts. > The least time you spend on them the better, nothing good comes from dwelling. Negative visualization https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Negative_visualization https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Negative_visualization is absolutely a thing. If you do it properly (aiming towards psychological resilience and gratitude for the things one actually has) it can work quite well.
- vasco 3y ago
  Of course it exists, I described it in my comment. Look at this quote from wikipedia and compare it to my example of preparing for your parents to die: > Unlike the general focus of creative visualization of inducing an imaginary positive psychological and physiologic response, negative visualization focuses on training the practitioner on the negative outcomes of realistic life scenarios to desensitize or create psychological fitness in preparation for real-life losses Something existing and some people thinking it is a good idea doesn't mean it is. I'm not saying I'm right either, I'm sharing what I do and what I think. And what I think is that negative visualization is ridiculous. Live your life, bad things will happen anyway, why do you want to be sad in advance just to maybe be a little bit less sad later? I can't take this idea seriously, it's like someone who doesn't want to love for fear of getting a broken heart.
  - hamster77 3y ago
    As someone just now learning I have been negative visualizing since childhood, I’ll tell you it’s not a choice exactly. The thoughts just come to you (someone is going to die, I’m going to die, etc.)… sometimes I’m successful at knocking the thought out of my head quickly. Other times I dwell for a few minutes, having a mini-grieving session thinking what I would do in the situation. It passes and I go back to present life where you don’t think about these things at all. I don’t know if it’s something innate that I got used to and I subconsciously need to do for some reason (and perhaps others do not)… not sure how much more resilient I’ll be if/when anything terrible happens, so agree not sure if best use of time
4death4 3y ago
Many things can also be framed so they’re not negative. Take your parents dying, for example. Everyone has finite time on this Earth. The relationships we choose to cultivate in our short existence are part of what make life beautiful. A life well lived can be something celebrate not mourn. Similarly, hardships in childhood can be something to decry and lament. Or they can be viewed as a the crucible in which your steely mettle was forged. How you think about these things is likely a reflection about how you feel about yourself.

by vasco 3y ago

zozbot234 3y ago

> But if you find yourself thinking about death, or about how much your childhood sucked, or that you're good for nothing, you don't need to address anything about those thoughts. > The least time you spend on them the better, nothing good comes from dwelling. Negative visualization https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Negative_visualization https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Negative_visualization is absolutely a thing. If you do it properly (aiming towards psychological resilience and gratitude for the things one actually has) it can work quite well.

vasco 3y ago
Of course it exists, I described it in my comment. Look at this quote from wikipedia and compare it to my example of preparing for your parents to die: > Unlike the general focus of creative visualization of inducing an imaginary positive psychological and physiologic response, negative visualization focuses on training the practitioner on the negative outcomes of realistic life scenarios to desensitize or create psychological fitness in preparation for real-life losses Something existing and some people thinking it is a good idea doesn't mean it is. I'm not saying I'm right either, I'm sharing what I do and what I think. And what I think is that negative visualization is ridiculous. Live your life, bad things will happen anyway, why do you want to be sad in advance just to maybe be a little bit less sad later? I can't take this idea seriously, it's like someone who doesn't want to love for fear of getting a broken heart.
- hamster77 3y ago
  As someone just now learning I have been negative visualizing since childhood, I’ll tell you it’s not a choice exactly. The thoughts just come to you (someone is going to die, I’m going to die, etc.)… sometimes I’m successful at knocking the thought out of my head quickly. Other times I dwell for a few minutes, having a mini-grieving session thinking what I would do in the situation. It passes and I go back to present life where you don’t think about these things at all. I don’t know if it’s something innate that I got used to and I subconsciously need to do for some reason (and perhaps others do not)… not sure how much more resilient I’ll be if/when anything terrible happens, so agree not sure if best use of time

4death4 3y ago

Many things can also be framed so they’re not negative. Take your parents dying, for example. Everyone has finite time on this Earth. The relationships we choose to cultivate in our short existence are part of what make life beautiful. A life well lived can be something celebrate not mourn. Similarly, hardships in childhood can be something to decry and lament. Or they can be viewed as a the crucible in which your steely mettle was forged. How you think about these things is likely a reflection about how you feel about yourself.