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Grateful/thankful to whom, exactly? It seems to me that the popular (American) practice of gratitude is just a substitute for Christianity, filtered out not to

Grateful/thankful to whom, exactly? It seems to me that the popular (American) practice of gratitude is just a substitute for Christianity, filtered out not to mention any deities explicitly, but still containing references to them implicitly. I consider universe a random and chaotic place. In that worldview, there is nobody to be grateful/thankful to, so the practice of gratitude doesn't make sense.

guntherhermann 3y ago
For being able to see For having all of my digits Clean drinking water Effectively infinite light at my fingertips (most of humanity couldn't do much when it got dark). The world's knowledge. So much food that I have to monitor how much I eat so I don't get too fat. For having a loving family, friends. For being given the opportunity to go to university. For having a career that pays well. That's just on the top of my head, but there's many more reasons to be grateful. That kind of thing. I have some physical disabilities, but reminding myself of the good things I do have grounds me, makes me realise all the things I used to stress about aren't really that important.
- bheadmaster 3y ago
  I'm not asking for reasons. I'm asking: whom are you grateful to?
  - mdp2021 3y ago
    You are misunderstanding the idea. You can be in some internal posture without an excuse. There is no need to have an "eternal reference".
  - guntherhermann 3y ago
    I don't believe in a "creator/higher being" if that's what you're getting at, with that in mind - as I said above - the other people I'm grateful for are my family and my friends. Thinking about it more, I suppose I'm also grateful for the individuals in this world who have had an incredible impact on this world. e.g. Jonas Salk, the guy who invented penecillin, etc.
  - thunderbong 3y ago
    Grateful to life, I guess. And not so much as grateful to but more like grateful for.
  - psiops 3y ago
    In your case, just substitute "feeling gratitude for positive things in your life" with "consciously acknowledge positive things in your life".
    - mdp2021 3y ago
      No, that is "run" vs "make an inventory sitting at the desk".
    - bheadmaster 3y ago
      That makes sense. I just really dislike people framing it as "practicing gratitude". I guess it comes from the childhood feelings of being thankful to one's parents for stuff, which is then generalized to "any feeling that resembles that feeling". I can accept "consciously acknowledge positive things in your life" and I can see why it would be beneficial to one's mental health. Depression and anxiety are often caused/worsened by focusing on the negative aspects of life.
- PlunderBunny 3y ago
  I try to do the same, and I find a good time to do it is as soon as I wake up in the morning, before I even get out of bed. It puts me in the right frame of mind to tackle the day.
deleted 3y ago
[deleted]
keyrat 3y ago
Serious question: are you making this comment to justify being cynical? I can’t tell if you’re being neutral or not.
- bheadmaster 3y ago
  I am making this question because I am trying to understand what exactly people mean when they say things. In this case, I'm trying to understand the full context of the phrase practicing gratitude. A definition of the word "gratitude" I've found online is: the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness Which implies that someone has shown kindness to us, and we're feeling grateful for their kindness. So when you say "I'm grateful for being alive", to whom exactly are you grateful? Who exactly has shown you kindness by letting you be alive? More generally, who exactly has shown you kindness by giving you everything good that you're grateful for? The only entity that could possibly be responsible for everything is a hypothetical omnipotent entity - a god. So outside the religious frame of mind, the answer is "nobody", and the word "gratitude" here means something else than it usually means when used in everyday context. In that case, I'd like to know the exact meaning in this special case. But I think I've got my answer in this comment: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=37566516 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=37566516
  - anon84873628 3y ago
    >I consider universe a random and chaotic place. In that worldview, there is nobody to be grateful/thankful to, so the practice of gratitude doesn't make sense. Grateful for the outcome of the cosmic dice roll. Or really just relief that things aren't a lot worse. The dictionary definition isn't the only meaning of a word.
    - bheadmaster 3y ago
      > Grateful for the outcome of the cosmic dice roll. To whom, the cosmos? Cosmos is not a person. You can personify it if you want, sure, but that doesn't make sense to me. > The dictionary definition isn't the only meaning of a word. Which is exactly why I'm asking for what people mean when they say stuff.
vidarh 3y ago
Gratitude does not require an object. You can have the feeling without feeling it towards anyone or anything.

guntherhermann 3y ago

For being able to see For having all of my digits Clean drinking water Effectively infinite light at my fingertips (most of humanity couldn't do much when it got dark). The world's knowledge. So much food that I have to monitor how much I eat so I don't get too fat. For having a loving family, friends. For being given the opportunity to go to university. For having a career that pays well. That's just on the top of my head, but there's many more reasons to be grateful. That kind of thing. I have some physical disabilities, but reminding myself of the good things I do have grounds me, makes me realise all the things I used to stress about aren't really that important.

bheadmaster 3y ago
I'm not asking for reasons. I'm asking: whom are you grateful to?
- mdp2021 3y ago
  You are misunderstanding the idea. You can be in some internal posture without an excuse. There is no need to have an "eternal reference".
- guntherhermann 3y ago
  I don't believe in a "creator/higher being" if that's what you're getting at, with that in mind - as I said above - the other people I'm grateful for are my family and my friends. Thinking about it more, I suppose I'm also grateful for the individuals in this world who have had an incredible impact on this world. e.g. Jonas Salk, the guy who invented penecillin, etc.
- thunderbong 3y ago
  Grateful to life, I guess. And not so much as grateful to but more like grateful for.
- psiops 3y ago
  In your case, just substitute "feeling gratitude for positive things in your life" with "consciously acknowledge positive things in your life".
  - mdp2021 3y ago
    No, that is "run" vs "make an inventory sitting at the desk".
  - bheadmaster 3y ago
    That makes sense. I just really dislike people framing it as "practicing gratitude". I guess it comes from the childhood feelings of being thankful to one's parents for stuff, which is then generalized to "any feeling that resembles that feeling". I can accept "consciously acknowledge positive things in your life" and I can see why it would be beneficial to one's mental health. Depression and anxiety are often caused/worsened by focusing on the negative aspects of life.
PlunderBunny 3y ago
I try to do the same, and I find a good time to do it is as soon as I wake up in the morning, before I even get out of bed. It puts me in the right frame of mind to tackle the day.

deleted 3y ago

[deleted]

keyrat 3y ago

Serious question: are you making this comment to justify being cynical? I can’t tell if you’re being neutral or not.

bheadmaster 3y ago
I am making this question because I am trying to understand what exactly people mean when they say things. In this case, I'm trying to understand the full context of the phrase practicing gratitude. A definition of the word "gratitude" I've found online is: the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness Which implies that someone has shown kindness to us, and we're feeling grateful for their kindness. So when you say "I'm grateful for being alive", to whom exactly are you grateful? Who exactly has shown you kindness by letting you be alive? More generally, who exactly has shown you kindness by giving you everything good that you're grateful for? The only entity that could possibly be responsible for everything is a hypothetical omnipotent entity - a god. So outside the religious frame of mind, the answer is "nobody", and the word "gratitude" here means something else than it usually means when used in everyday context. In that case, I'd like to know the exact meaning in this special case. But I think I've got my answer in this comment: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=37566516 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=37566516
- anon84873628 3y ago
  >I consider universe a random and chaotic place. In that worldview, there is nobody to be grateful/thankful to, so the practice of gratitude doesn't make sense. Grateful for the outcome of the cosmic dice roll. Or really just relief that things aren't a lot worse. The dictionary definition isn't the only meaning of a word.
  - bheadmaster 3y ago
    > Grateful for the outcome of the cosmic dice roll. To whom, the cosmos? Cosmos is not a person. You can personify it if you want, sure, but that doesn't make sense to me. > The dictionary definition isn't the only meaning of a word. Which is exactly why I'm asking for what people mean when they say stuff.

vidarh 3y ago

Gratitude does not require an object. You can have the feeling without feeling it towards anyone or anything.