4 ms·

Not sure by bt4u's comment is dead, but I've had that exact situation happen to me. Been accused of trying to steal a child while taking my son to the playgroun

Not sure by bt4u's comment is dead, but I've had that exact situation happen to me. Been accused of trying to steal a child while taking my son to the playground. It is an actual thing and it sucks.

MaKey 3y ago
Is this an American thing? I can't imagine that happening in Europe, but maybe I'm just a bit naive.
- fullstop 3y ago
  It might be. I would get strange looks when I took my kids to the playground without my wife. They look like me, too.
- bsagdiyev 3y ago
  Yes, in California at the time. Some people get weird. It isn't like it happens all the time, it was a first for me.
- wkat4242 3y ago
  Yeah we're kinda over the traditional family thing here in Europe. I would bet two fathers taking their son to the playground would raise some eyebrows in the US too, depending on the area of course. Whereas here it wouldn't.
  - bryanlarsen 3y ago
    I think it depends on where you are in Europe. I had far more reaction doing childcare in Poland than I did in the US and Canada. Almost completely positive, though. "Your wife is so lucky, a Polish man would never change a diaper".
    - wkat4242 3y ago
      Oh ok, that surprises me, Poland has a reputation of being very strongly anti-LGBT (and Hungary too). Guess it depends on the area. When I was in Ireland there were many people against single parents "Lone parents" they call them there, it was a real witch hunt in the media. So yeah we get these things here but it tends to be localised.
    - sillyfluke 3y ago
      Did you ever feel people were moments away from calling security/police on you? Your last sentence doesn't give that feeling. If not, I'm not sure we're talking about comparable reactions.
  - Glawen 3y ago
    It definitely will raise eyebrows, but maybe noone will say a thing. It really depends on the location though.
- sillyfluke 3y ago
  Yes, this is completely an American thing. I experienced it first hand and it's hilarious. Hilarious in that it's so pathetically predicable that I can predict there's going to be a "situation" before it unfolds and am able to avoid it. But it's absolutely batshit crazy how easily it happens. No way this happens in europe. Helicopter americans probably claim there is more child trafficking and kidnapping in europe or something. Yeah, ok. These people watch so many child kidnapping movies and documentaries they don't know which way is up anymore.
scruple 3y ago
I was at an amusement park recently. Took my daughter to go to the bathroom. I used a family stall. Someone knocked on the door and I said, "Occupied, we won't be much longer!" I heard a hushed whisper. A minute later, we're finishing up, washing our hands. A more aggressive knock, a man's voice, "Security. Open the door!" This older woman with her 10-ish year old daughter had assumed that I, as a man, had no business being in a family stall. She went to get security to sort me out. Security asked me why I was using the family stall. I opened the door all of the way and pointed at my daughter (we have twin girls who are 4) who was drying her hands. The mom is aghast, "Where's her mother?" I scooped up my daughter and said, "I helped make her, too. Mom's busy. Mind your own business." and went back to my wife. This is the most egregious example that I have but it's not at all an isolated event. Something in this direction has happened to me well over a dozen times in the last 4 years. Another strong signal you can find: Many, maybe most, men's restrooms don't have a changing table. I've changed countless diapers while sitting on a toilet with one of my kids in my lap.

Not sure by bt4u's comment is dead, but I've had that exact situation happen to me. Been accused of trying to steal a child while taking my son to the playground. It is an actual thing and it sucks.

MaKey 3y ago

Is this an American thing? I can't imagine that happening in Europe, but maybe I'm just a bit naive.

fullstop 3y ago
It might be. I would get strange looks when I took my kids to the playground without my wife. They look like me, too.
bsagdiyev 3y ago
Yes, in California at the time. Some people get weird. It isn't like it happens all the time, it was a first for me.
wkat4242 3y ago
Yeah we're kinda over the traditional family thing here in Europe. I would bet two fathers taking their son to the playground would raise some eyebrows in the US too, depending on the area of course. Whereas here it wouldn't.
- bryanlarsen 3y ago
  I think it depends on where you are in Europe. I had far more reaction doing childcare in Poland than I did in the US and Canada. Almost completely positive, though. "Your wife is so lucky, a Polish man would never change a diaper".
  - wkat4242 3y ago
    Oh ok, that surprises me, Poland has a reputation of being very strongly anti-LGBT (and Hungary too). Guess it depends on the area. When I was in Ireland there were many people against single parents "Lone parents" they call them there, it was a real witch hunt in the media. So yeah we get these things here but it tends to be localised.
  - sillyfluke 3y ago
    Did you ever feel people were moments away from calling security/police on you? Your last sentence doesn't give that feeling. If not, I'm not sure we're talking about comparable reactions.
- Glawen 3y ago
  It definitely will raise eyebrows, but maybe noone will say a thing. It really depends on the location though.
sillyfluke 3y ago
Yes, this is completely an American thing. I experienced it first hand and it's hilarious. Hilarious in that it's so pathetically predicable that I can predict there's going to be a "situation" before it unfolds and am able to avoid it. But it's absolutely batshit crazy how easily it happens. No way this happens in europe. Helicopter americans probably claim there is more child trafficking and kidnapping in europe or something. Yeah, ok. These people watch so many child kidnapping movies and documentaries they don't know which way is up anymore.

scruple 3y ago

I was at an amusement park recently. Took my daughter to go to the bathroom. I used a family stall. Someone knocked on the door and I said, "Occupied, we won't be much longer!" I heard a hushed whisper. A minute later, we're finishing up, washing our hands. A more aggressive knock, a man's voice, "Security. Open the door!" This older woman with her 10-ish year old daughter had assumed that I, as a man, had no business being in a family stall. She went to get security to sort me out. Security asked me why I was using the family stall. I opened the door all of the way and pointed at my daughter (we have twin girls who are 4) who was drying her hands. The mom is aghast, "Where's her mother?" I scooped up my daughter and said, "I helped make her, too. Mom's busy. Mind your own business." and went back to my wife. This is the most egregious example that I have but it's not at all an isolated event. Something in this direction has happened to me well over a dozen times in the last 4 years. Another strong signal you can find: Many, maybe most, men's restrooms don't have a changing table. I've changed countless diapers while sitting on a toilet with one of my kids in my lap.