11 ms·

"Help with homework", I have seen this in movies. Is this a cultural thing? I don't know any parents that help there children with homework.

teddyh 3y ago
Culturally normalized cheating. Also gives advantage to those with rich parents who can afford the time.
- consoomer 3y ago
  It's cheating to help a 7 year old understand how to do basic math? Because the alternative is them staring at a paper and writing random numbers down.
  - p1esk 3y ago
    So what do they do in school all day?
    - ghaff 3y ago
      Because everyone has personalized tutors at school.
      - p1esk 3y ago
        I didn't have tutors or parents helping me with homework when I was in school. Also, bad grades were not tolerated in my household, so I had to keep up.
        blogornot 3y ago
        You had a household where bad grades were not tolerated, but no support in achieving better grades? Sounds like a crappy household/parenting. That doesn't mean everyone else should have a crappy household or parenting philosophy because you managed to get through it.
    - barry-cotter 3y ago
      They are exposed to the material on which the sorting and ranking will be done.
  - melagonster 3y ago
    I do not call this is cheating. but this is a crazy advantage of children. some kids never learned learning is important, parents can let deep in their mind. teachers have some chance, but there are too many kids in classroom.
  - granshaw 3y ago
    The alternative is, you know, the school actually teaching well enough that they understand it without your help
  - teddyh 3y ago
    The understanding should happen in school. Homework should be only for things that have already been learned.
    - ghaff 3y ago
      If the learning is already complete then any homework seems like utterly unnecessary busywork.
      - teddyh 3y ago
        There’s learning, and there’s practice. Both are necessary.
        ResearchCode 3y ago
        Practice during school hours is more than enough. Primary education is not so demanding that you need more to succeed.
        teddyh 3y ago
        In which case homework should be wholly unnecessary.
        ResearchCode 3y ago
        It is, unless you spend too much time in a lecture format with too little deep practice. Taking work home is not a good solution.
    - liotier 3y ago
      It sure would be nice and just if the schools had the means to provide the personalized tutoring most children need to understand. Reality is that the parents do that - and yes, it is an advantage to children with parents able to invest time and skills in their education.
- flippinburgers 3y ago
  I found the person who doesn't have kids. Nothing about helping someone better understand something is cheating. Helping your own child? That is just natural. I find what you said revolting.
  - teddyh 3y ago
    If parents “help” kids with homework, the teacher will get a misleading view of what the kid has learned and is capable of. Other kids, lacking this “help”, will get worse grades. If you want to argue that the teacher understands that parents are helping their kids with the homework, then: 1. Why aren’t teachers sending study aids, pedagogical material, etc. to the parents, on order to aid in the further education of the kids? Why are teachers universally acting as though kids are supposed to do the homework on their own? 2. This would still only help kids with rich parent who can afford the time to be a part-time teacher to their kids. In summary: If teachers assume that kids do all their homework themselves, unassisted, then “helping” is (culturally normalized) cheating. If teachers instead assume that kids get help from their parents, it would be burdening kids with poor and/or busy parents with a severe disadvantage.
    - hyggetrold 3y ago
      How old are you, which country do you live in, and...do you yourself have children?
      - teddyh 3y ago
        I don’t want to feed your Ad Hominem monster. Find some actual arguments in the debate as presented.
        deleted 3y ago
        [deleted]
        hyggetrold 3y ago
        You're funny. Good luck.
unshavedyak 3y ago
Not sure what other regions are like, but i believe this is more necessary the less children receive adequate attention in the school setting. Ie overfilled schools warrant more individual time outside of school. Without "help with homework", the child may have gotten no individual instruction/teaching, so how are they expected to learn? Even beyond that though there's the possibility of needing more and/or unique care. Parents are the end-of-the-road for ensuring that they raise a capable, educated human. Some children just struggle in standard school settings.
- badpun 3y ago
  I was in classes that averaged 30 chilren per class. I haven't gotten any individual instruction/teaching, and did just fine until high school math kicked in (bear in mind, this was Polish high-school math, and in a class that focuses on math), when I got lost and needed help of a tutor. But the other 98-99% of my school time, I was completely fine on my own. Also, I don't think I was any kind of exception.
  - unshavedyak 3y ago
    Not sure what your point is? Ignore the child because Badpun was fine? It honestly sounds like you're arguing against "Interact with your child, help them if you think they need it", which seems.. odd. You could perhaps be arguing that parents are wrong usually, and should go against their intuition on helping the child - but that's also a mixed bag.
    - badpun 3y ago
      I'm arguing that school's difficult level is set up for children to manage on their own just fine. Also, managing on their own means learning grit, figuring out what to do when you're stuck, learning how to find information etc. If a parent is hand-holding their child through their school experience, they may be taking away a chance to develop these skills in their kid.
      - 3y ago
DrThunder 3y ago
Homework shouldn't exist anyway. Maybe, for higher level high school classes it makes sense. There's no reason to be giving homework to elementary and middle school kids. They get them for 8 hours a day, they don't need to be spending more time on school stuff after school.
- hk__2 3y ago
  > Homework shouldn't exist anyway. Maybe, for higher level high school classes it makes sense. There's no reason to be giving homework to elementary and middle school kids. They get them for 8 hours a day, they don't need to be spending more time on school stuff after school. Yes, also because it creates inequalities very early between children with parents who can afford spending time helping them (or paying someone to do so) and those who can’t.
  - nsxwolf 3y ago
    I help my kids with homework, 5 minutes here and there. Seems like that shouldn't be too hard for most people, unless they literally never see their kids.
  - DrThunder 3y ago
    I didn't think of that one but that is a consideration as well. Children don't have the attention span to be working on school work for 8+ hours a a day anyway. Additionally, they should be developing through play/socializing just as much, if not more, as in-classroom and paperwork time.
pluijzer 3y ago
I've misspelled 'their', maybe my parents should've helped me with my English ;)
lemper 3y ago
around me, only kids whose parents are illiterate and/or busy make a living who don't get helped by their parents to do their homework and study. so, yes. cultural thing.
nsxwolf 3y ago
I help my kids with their homework. I don't do it for them, or anything like that. My mom helped me with mine when she could. Is that weird?
bcrosby95 3y ago
My kids are in elementary school now and all homework except reading is optional. However, I have them do their homework then I review it when I'm done with work. Any concepts they don't understand I go over with them. It's usually 5-10 minutes per night per kid. If I didn't do this my oldest would have easily flunked math last year. But just a few minutes per night of making sure she understood the concepts was the difference between that and her acing it. I started this because we had a teacher that was really bad at noticing if one of our kids was understanding things or not. For example, we got worksheets back from school where everything was done incorrectly and there was just a giant star on it. Fuck that.

teddyh 3y ago

Culturally normalized cheating. Also gives advantage to those with rich parents who can afford the time.

consoomer 3y ago
It's cheating to help a 7 year old understand how to do basic math? Because the alternative is them staring at a paper and writing random numbers down.
- p1esk 3y ago
  So what do they do in school all day?
  - ghaff 3y ago
    Because everyone has personalized tutors at school.
    - p1esk 3y ago
      I didn't have tutors or parents helping me with homework when I was in school. Also, bad grades were not tolerated in my household, so I had to keep up.
      - blogornot 3y ago
        You had a household where bad grades were not tolerated, but no support in achieving better grades? Sounds like a crappy household/parenting. That doesn't mean everyone else should have a crappy household or parenting philosophy because you managed to get through it.
  - barry-cotter 3y ago
    They are exposed to the material on which the sorting and ranking will be done.
- melagonster 3y ago
  I do not call this is cheating. but this is a crazy advantage of children. some kids never learned learning is important, parents can let deep in their mind. teachers have some chance, but there are too many kids in classroom.
- granshaw 3y ago
  The alternative is, you know, the school actually teaching well enough that they understand it without your help
- teddyh 3y ago
  The understanding should happen in school. Homework should be only for things that have already been learned.
  - ghaff 3y ago
    If the learning is already complete then any homework seems like utterly unnecessary busywork.
    - teddyh 3y ago
      There’s learning, and there’s practice. Both are necessary.
      - ResearchCode 3y ago
        Practice during school hours is more than enough. Primary education is not so demanding that you need more to succeed.
        teddyh 3y ago
        In which case homework should be wholly unnecessary.
        ResearchCode 3y ago
        It is, unless you spend too much time in a lecture format with too little deep practice. Taking work home is not a good solution.
  - liotier 3y ago
    It sure would be nice and just if the schools had the means to provide the personalized tutoring most children need to understand. Reality is that the parents do that - and yes, it is an advantage to children with parents able to invest time and skills in their education.
flippinburgers 3y ago
I found the person who doesn't have kids. Nothing about helping someone better understand something is cheating. Helping your own child? That is just natural. I find what you said revolting.
- teddyh 3y ago
  If parents “help” kids with homework, the teacher will get a misleading view of what the kid has learned and is capable of. Other kids, lacking this “help”, will get worse grades. If you want to argue that the teacher understands that parents are helping their kids with the homework, then: 1. Why aren’t teachers sending study aids, pedagogical material, etc. to the parents, on order to aid in the further education of the kids? Why are teachers universally acting as though kids are supposed to do the homework on their own? 2. This would still only help kids with rich parent who can afford the time to be a part-time teacher to their kids. In summary: If teachers assume that kids do all their homework themselves, unassisted, then “helping” is (culturally normalized) cheating. If teachers instead assume that kids get help from their parents, it would be burdening kids with poor and/or busy parents with a severe disadvantage.
  - hyggetrold 3y ago
    How old are you, which country do you live in, and...do you yourself have children?
    - teddyh 3y ago
      I don’t want to feed your Ad Hominem monster. Find some actual arguments in the debate as presented.
      - deleted 3y ago
        [deleted]
      - hyggetrold 3y ago
        You're funny. Good luck.

unshavedyak 3y ago

Not sure what other regions are like, but i believe this is more necessary the less children receive adequate attention in the school setting. Ie overfilled schools warrant more individual time outside of school. Without "help with homework", the child may have gotten no individual instruction/teaching, so how are they expected to learn? Even beyond that though there's the possibility of needing more and/or unique care. Parents are the end-of-the-road for ensuring that they raise a capable, educated human. Some children just struggle in standard school settings.

badpun 3y ago
I was in classes that averaged 30 chilren per class. I haven't gotten any individual instruction/teaching, and did just fine until high school math kicked in (bear in mind, this was Polish high-school math, and in a class that focuses on math), when I got lost and needed help of a tutor. But the other 98-99% of my school time, I was completely fine on my own. Also, I don't think I was any kind of exception.
- unshavedyak 3y ago
  Not sure what your point is? Ignore the child because Badpun was fine? It honestly sounds like you're arguing against "Interact with your child, help them if you think they need it", which seems.. odd. You could perhaps be arguing that parents are wrong usually, and should go against their intuition on helping the child - but that's also a mixed bag.
  - badpun 3y ago
    I'm arguing that school's difficult level is set up for children to manage on their own just fine. Also, managing on their own means learning grit, figuring out what to do when you're stuck, learning how to find information etc. If a parent is hand-holding their child through their school experience, they may be taking away a chance to develop these skills in their kid.
    - 3y ago

DrThunder 3y ago

Homework shouldn't exist anyway. Maybe, for higher level high school classes it makes sense. There's no reason to be giving homework to elementary and middle school kids. They get them for 8 hours a day, they don't need to be spending more time on school stuff after school.

hk__2 3y ago
> Homework shouldn't exist anyway. Maybe, for higher level high school classes it makes sense. There's no reason to be giving homework to elementary and middle school kids. They get them for 8 hours a day, they don't need to be spending more time on school stuff after school. Yes, also because it creates inequalities very early between children with parents who can afford spending time helping them (or paying someone to do so) and those who can’t.
- nsxwolf 3y ago
  I help my kids with homework, 5 minutes here and there. Seems like that shouldn't be too hard for most people, unless they literally never see their kids.
- DrThunder 3y ago
  I didn't think of that one but that is a consideration as well. Children don't have the attention span to be working on school work for 8+ hours a a day anyway. Additionally, they should be developing through play/socializing just as much, if not more, as in-classroom and paperwork time.

pluijzer 3y ago

I've misspelled 'their', maybe my parents should've helped me with my English ;)

lemper 3y ago

around me, only kids whose parents are illiterate and/or busy make a living who don't get helped by their parents to do their homework and study. so, yes. cultural thing.

nsxwolf 3y ago

I help my kids with their homework. I don't do it for them, or anything like that. My mom helped me with mine when she could. Is that weird?

bcrosby95 3y ago

My kids are in elementary school now and all homework except reading is optional. However, I have them do their homework then I review it when I'm done with work. Any concepts they don't understand I go over with them. It's usually 5-10 minutes per night per kid. If I didn't do this my oldest would have easily flunked math last year. But just a few minutes per night of making sure she understood the concepts was the difference between that and her acing it. I started this because we had a teacher that was really bad at noticing if one of our kids was understanding things or not. For example, we got worksheets back from school where everything was done incorrectly and there was just a giant star on it. Fuck that.