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> But for the sake of those that aren't, maybe let's leave them be and not raze to the ground what's emerged as a stand-in for actual social support and strong

> But for the sake of those that aren't, maybe let's leave them be and not raze to the ground what's emerged as a stand-in for actual social support and strong kinship ties? Who is that "we" that could raze social media pity to the ground? In places infested by fake beggars we don't hold council meetings where we decide to stop giving them money. When I see that my compassion is being taken advantage of, I become less compassionate. Chances are, so do you. Social media pity won't be destroyed by those that complain about it. It'll be destroyed by those that abuse it.

NoZebra120vClip 3y ago
Rather than allow my compassion to be decimated, or chipped away bit by bit, I simply outsource my compassion. I never take pity on individuals, whether they are begging at the train station, a grocery store, or somewhere on the Internet. No pity for individual situations. I absolutely cannot and will not trust someone's claims and I absolutely cannot judge their worthiness for charity. I give generously to charitable organizations that do the most good. This is my religious obligation, and it's also the best way to maximize my bucks. Any suitably large charitable organization will have policies and guidelines for determining who is in need, and how much they deserve. It's simply a matter of trusting that they know how to vet people's needs, and how to distribute aid most effectively in the region that they serve. I have seen it myself first-hand. I volunteered for a charity that serves the poor, and right in the middle of downtown. It was my job to interview people to find out their immediate needs: socks, bag lunch, shower, bus ticket. And we had intricate and firm rules for how much they could get, and how often they could get it. Some people even received a bicycle, if their needs could be matched with its availability. But obviously, we only had so much to give, and needy people are, unfortunately, experts at squeezing free stuff out of everyone they could. So, we had rate limits and daily/weekly limits on everything. No bus passes without proof of need; that sort of stuff. So it's the same with all the other charities I support, and they are often organizations I've worked with directly, and I know their reputation for service, and I trust their ability to manage money that I give them. No pity, no guilt, no stress.
- randunel 3y ago
  > I give generously to charitable organizations that do the most good. This is my religious obligation, and it's also the best way to maximize my bucks. And they maximize your bucks with outlandish purchases for executives and "fund raising" parties for their selected few. I stopped caring for large NGOs when I found out how deeply corrupt their management is, including middle management. If you want to help, don't give them money, donate your time or goods, instead. The vast majority of your money goes into managerial salaries, bonuses and needless services and purchases. Look up the red cross or any other large organisation you may have in your area, they all do this without exceptions.
  - NoZebra120vClip 3y ago
    Hey, randunel, thanks for mentioning the American Red Cross! In fact, I have anecdotes about them as well! So about two weeks into the COVID-19 lockdowns, one of my upstairs neighbors set his apartment, and the unit next door, on fire. Like a big fire. The resultant fire, smoke, and water damage affected six units altogether, and the American Red Cross was right there on the scene, to render assistance and ensure that these families would not be turned out onto the streets. I didn't look closely at the news reports, but I didn't see any mention of randunel being there to help. Then last year, an ex of mine suffered a fire in her very own flat in SF. She has been disabled with a major stroke, and her roommate was also displaced, escaping with only what they could carry and their cats. After the fire was doused, thieves wasted no time in breaking in to take whatever wasn't nailed down. Again, the American Red Cross was on the scene (randunel conspicuously absent) and a GoFundMe was launched. As I stuck to my principles of donating to the best agency possible, I decided to send a few bucks to the AMR. In fact, I accidentally donated first to my local AMR, and then I doubled that by donating to the correct regional one in charge of San Francisco. I thought it to be quite appropriate to give back a little, since after all, they had helped my neighbors in need not long ago. So if it weren't for the American Red Cross and their good deeds, many Americans would be homeless and lost after disasters, and I'm thankful to them for being there in our times of need.
    - SapporoChris 3y ago

NoZebra120vClip 3y ago

Rather than allow my compassion to be decimated, or chipped away bit by bit, I simply outsource my compassion. I never take pity on individuals, whether they are begging at the train station, a grocery store, or somewhere on the Internet. No pity for individual situations. I absolutely cannot and will not trust someone's claims and I absolutely cannot judge their worthiness for charity. I give generously to charitable organizations that do the most good. This is my religious obligation, and it's also the best way to maximize my bucks. Any suitably large charitable organization will have policies and guidelines for determining who is in need, and how much they deserve. It's simply a matter of trusting that they know how to vet people's needs, and how to distribute aid most effectively in the region that they serve. I have seen it myself first-hand. I volunteered for a charity that serves the poor, and right in the middle of downtown. It was my job to interview people to find out their immediate needs: socks, bag lunch, shower, bus ticket. And we had intricate and firm rules for how much they could get, and how often they could get it. Some people even received a bicycle, if their needs could be matched with its availability. But obviously, we only had so much to give, and needy people are, unfortunately, experts at squeezing free stuff out of everyone they could. So, we had rate limits and daily/weekly limits on everything. No bus passes without proof of need; that sort of stuff. So it's the same with all the other charities I support, and they are often organizations I've worked with directly, and I know their reputation for service, and I trust their ability to manage money that I give them. No pity, no guilt, no stress.

randunel 3y ago
> I give generously to charitable organizations that do the most good. This is my religious obligation, and it's also the best way to maximize my bucks. And they maximize your bucks with outlandish purchases for executives and "fund raising" parties for their selected few. I stopped caring for large NGOs when I found out how deeply corrupt their management is, including middle management. If you want to help, don't give them money, donate your time or goods, instead. The vast majority of your money goes into managerial salaries, bonuses and needless services and purchases. Look up the red cross or any other large organisation you may have in your area, they all do this without exceptions.
- NoZebra120vClip 3y ago
  Hey, randunel, thanks for mentioning the American Red Cross! In fact, I have anecdotes about them as well! So about two weeks into the COVID-19 lockdowns, one of my upstairs neighbors set his apartment, and the unit next door, on fire. Like a big fire. The resultant fire, smoke, and water damage affected six units altogether, and the American Red Cross was right there on the scene, to render assistance and ensure that these families would not be turned out onto the streets. I didn't look closely at the news reports, but I didn't see any mention of randunel being there to help. Then last year, an ex of mine suffered a fire in her very own flat in SF. She has been disabled with a major stroke, and her roommate was also displaced, escaping with only what they could carry and their cats. After the fire was doused, thieves wasted no time in breaking in to take whatever wasn't nailed down. Again, the American Red Cross was on the scene (randunel conspicuously absent) and a GoFundMe was launched. As I stuck to my principles of donating to the best agency possible, I decided to send a few bucks to the AMR. In fact, I accidentally donated first to my local AMR, and then I doubled that by donating to the correct regional one in charge of San Francisco. I thought it to be quite appropriate to give back a little, since after all, they had helped my neighbors in need not long ago. So if it weren't for the American Red Cross and their good deeds, many Americans would be homeless and lost after disasters, and I'm thankful to them for being there in our times of need.
  - SapporoChris 3y ago