2 ms·

A good friend has two children, one with fairly severe autism and one with extra-strong interpersonal skills. They both go to the same school, but the kid with

A good friend has two children, one with fairly severe autism and one with extra-strong interpersonal skills. They both go to the same school, but the kid with autism gets special care, including specialized teachers working with him. This is certainly not to say you are wrong! Rather, it's to point out the vast differences between one public school and another. I have to remind myself sometimes that, even though my public school experience was pretty solid, I had a lot of things working in my favor, like living in a solidly middle-class liberal suburb, having access to lots of honors and AP classes and having several brilliant (and over-qualified) teachers in some departments. Most Americans do not get anything close to such a sweet deal out of their public schools.

twodave 3y ago
Our kids have all been diagnosed with FASD, but in our state at least that isn’t enough to qualify for specialized care. Not that it matters a ton, because we would still be fighting the other bullet points. We can get scholarships through the state if we get our kids diagnosed with a mental handicap, and that costs around $3k per child and requires them to be evaluated intensively (which is more difficult for some of our kids than others). So that’s the path we are taking, because at least after the $3k much of the therapy they each need can be reimbursed through the state (up to a certain amount each year). There are a ton of kids in this situation—-either adopted or in foster care, mom abused drugs and alcohol during the pregnancy, and even those of us who pay to adopt these kids from birth/early age (~$30k each for us) there is just very little support available. We are essentially doing the state a favor by not putting these kids into foster care or making them be the public school’s problem, and we don’t get repaid unless we happened to know about FASD, get a diagnosis and apply for an adoption subsidy BEFORE adopting them. It’s absurd.

twodave 3y ago

Our kids have all been diagnosed with FASD, but in our state at least that isn’t enough to qualify for specialized care. Not that it matters a ton, because we would still be fighting the other bullet points. We can get scholarships through the state if we get our kids diagnosed with a mental handicap, and that costs around $3k per child and requires them to be evaluated intensively (which is more difficult for some of our kids than others). So that’s the path we are taking, because at least after the $3k much of the therapy they each need can be reimbursed through the state (up to a certain amount each year). There are a ton of kids in this situation—-either adopted or in foster care, mom abused drugs and alcohol during the pregnancy, and even those of us who pay to adopt these kids from birth/early age (~$30k each for us) there is just very little support available. We are essentially doing the state a favor by not putting these kids into foster care or making them be the public school’s problem, and we don’t get repaid unless we happened to know about FASD, get a diagnosis and apply for an adoption subsidy BEFORE adopting them. It’s absurd.