5 ms·

Your résumé is red flag after red flag. Regardless of background check, there is absolutely no possibility I would hire someone who submitted that. Get rid of

Your résumé is red flag after red flag. Regardless of background check, there is absolutely no possibility I would hire someone who submitted that. Get rid of the emojis. The "Bugs and Features" section should not exist. "Hi mom (very dead; very sad)" is completely inappropriate. You say you are "Very detail oriented," which is incoherent, since someone who actually was detail-oriented would not have omitted the hyphen. You say you are a "Voracious writer," which is incoherent, since someone who wrote a lot would know that that the word "voracious" relates to consumption, not production. The story about sticking a fork in a light socket is inappropriate and weird. This résumé is fundamentally inconsiderate. It appears to be intended to make people feel ill at ease. I strongly recommend you reconsider it. ALSO: I don't know you, but I can't shake the suspicion that the résumé and the cURL incident are related, i.e., that there's a fundamental TPJ issue preventing you from understanding how your actions will come across to others.

2-718-281-828 3y ago
> Get rid of the emojis. found only 1 emoji. > "Hi mom (very dead; very sad)" is completely inappropriate. that's pretty bad ... actually, i would assume mental problems just from reading this. [1] 1: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clanging https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clanging
- redox99 3y ago
  I assume he/she is editing it as we speak?
- Humdeee 3y ago
  It looks like it's a live doc? And it's being changed in real time
- joenot443 3y ago
  I think it's just silliness, not necessarily clanging. Perhaps reminiscient of the 2010s doge-era "much good, very wow" memetic.
  - yuppie_scum 3y ago
    No, it’s awful and needs to go. Random company recruiter is going to throw that resume in the bin so fast when she sees it
    - joenot443 3y ago
      You're right, weird gags have no place on a resume; I was just being pedantic and wondering aloud about what I thought he was going for.
deleted 3y ago
[deleted]
Michelangelo11 3y ago
> This résumé is fundamentally inconsiderate. It appears to be intended to make people feel ill at ease. Really well put. While reading this, there were a few points at which I felt my gut tense up in disgust. I can't remember the last time I felt so revolted by something I've read, and I have a very hard time figuring out how a resume, which is supposed to make people want to hire you, could end up doing that. OP, please consider dropping this completely and switching to a regular resume format.
- progman32 3y ago
  Counterpoint, I don't disagree with the advice given but I wasn't put off too much by this. I think that if I ran across this resume with no additional context I'd think it's a bit silly and make a note to evaluate professionalism and willingness to set aside the jokes when needed. I certainly don't have a visceral reaction, but I understand people's reaction. It's getting quite negative in here.
  - minimaxir 3y ago
    > make a note to evaluate professionalism and willingness to set aside the jokes when needed Tech recruiters receive hundreds of normal resumes that don't require that extra effort/risk.
minimaxir 3y ago
Even if this weren't a professional resume, the humor used in general is bad and would come across poorly even in normal conversation.
atoav 3y ago
To me a resume that is outside the norm can be a good thing, in this case it gives me a vivid image of what that person might be like and it is not a person I'd like to be around. That means the quick fix here is to skip all the "fun" side-tracking and focus on the raw skills you can offer. The sustainable fix is to figure out why you ever could think this was a good idea in the first place. As my parent poster said the answer to this question might easily also answer to the root cause of a ton of other problems in your life. Now times of economic distress are not the best time for introspection, but you might wanna address this sooner than later.
- creer 3y ago
  Yes to this. We can be out of the norm - and emphasize that - without being "funny". Funny is a dangerous quick road to "unprofessional". Too risky for a resume. Pretty risky for an interview beyond a small dose and even that better be "safe humor".
  - atoav 3y ago
    This is especially true if you want to be seen as a person that takes things (like for example a felony conviction) serious.
drewcoo 3y ago
I mostly agree, but "incoherent?" You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. - Inigo Montoya
- torstenvl 3y ago
  incoherent - adj. - lacking cohesion, i.e., internally inconsistent.
  - gremlinsinc 3y ago
    discombobulating might be better, as I agree incoherent just feels out of place in this context, but we can all agree it's a confusing choice to put on his resume. if anything it would be coherent actually because his confusing choices are consistently awkward throughout.

2-718-281-828 3y ago

> Get rid of the emojis. found only 1 emoji. > "Hi mom (very dead; very sad)" is completely inappropriate. that's pretty bad ... actually, i would assume mental problems just from reading this. [1] 1: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clanging https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clanging

redox99 3y ago
I assume he/she is editing it as we speak?
Humdeee 3y ago
It looks like it's a live doc? And it's being changed in real time
joenot443 3y ago
I think it's just silliness, not necessarily clanging. Perhaps reminiscient of the 2010s doge-era "much good, very wow" memetic.
- yuppie_scum 3y ago
  No, it’s awful and needs to go. Random company recruiter is going to throw that resume in the bin so fast when she sees it
  - joenot443 3y ago
    You're right, weird gags have no place on a resume; I was just being pedantic and wondering aloud about what I thought he was going for.

deleted 3y ago

[deleted]

Michelangelo11 3y ago

> This résumé is fundamentally inconsiderate. It appears to be intended to make people feel ill at ease. Really well put. While reading this, there were a few points at which I felt my gut tense up in disgust. I can't remember the last time I felt so revolted by something I've read, and I have a very hard time figuring out how a resume, which is supposed to make people want to hire you, could end up doing that. OP, please consider dropping this completely and switching to a regular resume format.

progman32 3y ago
Counterpoint, I don't disagree with the advice given but I wasn't put off too much by this. I think that if I ran across this resume with no additional context I'd think it's a bit silly and make a note to evaluate professionalism and willingness to set aside the jokes when needed. I certainly don't have a visceral reaction, but I understand people's reaction. It's getting quite negative in here.
- minimaxir 3y ago
  > make a note to evaluate professionalism and willingness to set aside the jokes when needed Tech recruiters receive hundreds of normal resumes that don't require that extra effort/risk.

minimaxir 3y ago

Even if this weren't a professional resume, the humor used in general is bad and would come across poorly even in normal conversation.

atoav 3y ago

To me a resume that is outside the norm can be a good thing, in this case it gives me a vivid image of what that person might be like and it is not a person I'd like to be around. That means the quick fix here is to skip all the "fun" side-tracking and focus on the raw skills you can offer. The sustainable fix is to figure out why you ever could think this was a good idea in the first place. As my parent poster said the answer to this question might easily also answer to the root cause of a ton of other problems in your life. Now times of economic distress are not the best time for introspection, but you might wanna address this sooner than later.

creer 3y ago
Yes to this. We can be out of the norm - and emphasize that - without being "funny". Funny is a dangerous quick road to "unprofessional". Too risky for a resume. Pretty risky for an interview beyond a small dose and even that better be "safe humor".
- atoav 3y ago
  This is especially true if you want to be seen as a person that takes things (like for example a felony conviction) serious.

drewcoo 3y ago

I mostly agree, but "incoherent?" You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. - Inigo Montoya

torstenvl 3y ago
incoherent - adj. - lacking cohesion, i.e., internally inconsistent.
- gremlinsinc 3y ago
  discombobulating might be better, as I agree incoherent just feels out of place in this context, but we can all agree it's a confusing choice to put on his resume. if anything it would be coherent actually because his confusing choices are consistently awkward throughout.