I actually couldn't tell if you were being satirical or not for a bit into your rant. Up until #4 (and then #6, and a few others), everything seemed to me like

I actually couldn't tell if you were being satirical or not for a bit into your rant. Up until #4 (and then #6, and a few others), everything seemed to me like shining examples of the midwestern attitudes. Surly, 'hardened', bitter, negative, and proud of it. My cofounder is from the midwest, and I'm a 'coastal' native. Just an interesting observation.