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"Why be EXTRA courteous to women? Already reveals you think of them as different." Because that's the ways boys were taught by BOTH schools and their parents w

"Why be EXTRA courteous to women? Already reveals you think of them as different." Because that's the ways boys were taught by BOTH schools and their parents when I was a kid not only from our youngest age but also it was reinforced throughout highschool until we left. This was sacrosanct value of good behavior in our society until recently. It's a damn shame that you and others like you are not old enough to have a sufficient sense of history to realize the problems and damage you are causing by accusing innocent people like me for having the normal views and values of my society's culture. It is extremely upsetting and unfair that you make such allegations. I'm not responsible for society having turned its values upsidedown in recent years.

deanCommie 3y ago
[flagged]
- hilbert42 3y ago
  "There are tens, hundreds of thousands of others like you on the internet" I've never mentioned this matter on the internet previously. And I do treat women equally both as colleagues at work and elsewhere and have always done so. The difference comes when someone is aggressive towards me. With a male I'll stand ground and argue back (but not physically), with a female I'll walk away. It's the prudent thing to do.
  - vixen99 3y ago
    I'm wondering what -arguing physically- might be.
  - deanCommie 3y ago
    > With a male I'll stand ground and argue back (but not physically), with a female I'll walk away. Could we continue digging into this in good faith? If they're so aggressive that it's unprofessional, then neither men nor women should be doing it to you! You should not rise to their level, remain professional and calm, defend your position intellectually without aggression. Try to settle the dispute, or escalate to management if need be. But after, you can give feedback to either them, to their manager, or to HR to determine how you two can have a similar disagreement in the future without unprofessional aggression. If it's just a tense disagreement of opinion and involves someone coming off aggressive, but remains professional, then why would you argue differently if it's a man or a woman? I'm sure there is more nuance to your point, but to me this seems fairly binary: Each of these scenarios is gender-agnostic.
- throeu73848 3y ago
  [flagged]

deanCommie 3y ago

[flagged]

hilbert42 3y ago
"There are tens, hundreds of thousands of others like you on the internet" I've never mentioned this matter on the internet previously. And I do treat women equally both as colleagues at work and elsewhere and have always done so. The difference comes when someone is aggressive towards me. With a male I'll stand ground and argue back (but not physically), with a female I'll walk away. It's the prudent thing to do.
- vixen99 3y ago
  I'm wondering what -arguing physically- might be.
- deanCommie 3y ago
  > With a male I'll stand ground and argue back (but not physically), with a female I'll walk away. Could we continue digging into this in good faith? If they're so aggressive that it's unprofessional, then neither men nor women should be doing it to you! You should not rise to their level, remain professional and calm, defend your position intellectually without aggression. Try to settle the dispute, or escalate to management if need be. But after, you can give feedback to either them, to their manager, or to HR to determine how you two can have a similar disagreement in the future without unprofessional aggression. If it's just a tense disagreement of opinion and involves someone coming off aggressive, but remains professional, then why would you argue differently if it's a man or a woman? I'm sure there is more nuance to your point, but to me this seems fairly binary: Each of these scenarios is gender-agnostic.
throeu73848 3y ago
[flagged]