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Growing up in the intense, unfettered gaming world of competitive vidya was incredible, especially with FPS's. It temporarily gave us back something that the re

Growing up in the intense, unfettered gaming world of competitive vidya was incredible, especially with FPS's. It temporarily gave us back something that the rest of modernity had taken away - a kind of Fight Club. It was like a Fight Club where we could project our primal selves, like a primal urge to just fight and shittalk and rage, and that probably sounds nasty to a domesticated modern, but it really was A Good Thing. It's really just good fun at the end of the day, but even further, it's almost therapeutic, whereas we all have to wear our masks throughout our day, but then we got to be the competitive, shittalking, carousing, brawling cavemen that live in all of us. Fight Clubs are for practicing taking hits as much as dishing them out. You practice giving your utmost brutality, your meanest, your dirtiest, and you also practice taking others' nastiest, because the world can be mean and nasty, and playing at that is one way to explore just how nasty it can be. When we play-fight in peacetime, it hardens us, prepares us for wartime. If you're only ever exposed to people at their best, how will you know how to deal with them at their worst? It's unfortunate to see these Fight Clubs disappearing at an increasing rate, with the advent of so many safe spaces. We need the opposite of safe spaces.

junofan 3y ago
Kids have gotten way more into other forms of bullying AFAICT.
- talldatethrow 3y ago
  I'm dating a middle school teacher right now. And she tries so hard to stop bullying, constantly trying to show videos and have discussions about how "words matter!!!! Choose your words carefully!!" On and on. I told her.. why don't you teach kids the truth.. the words don't matter. If a someone calls you stupid, and you aren't, who cares? If a bum calls me a loser, do I get upset? I move on. Only if someone you respect has a critique of you should you even pause for a split second and think about the critique. If some dude calls you fat, personally I would think "what kind of wierdo harps on someone's weight.. there must be something wrong with him. Thus, I don't care what he even says." But we instead teach kids "words matter!" So when they do get teased and bullied, they take the words to heart. So stupid.
  - sethaurus 3y ago
    Most people don't have the ability to choose what affects us emotionally. We can learn to build resilience and get less reactive, but we can't just turn off our emotional reactions completely. If you can do that, it sounds great. For most people, they cannot do this and cannot be taught to.
    - apple4ever 3y ago
      I disagree. It's not easy to choose, but it very much is possible, they can do it, and they get much can be taught to do so.
    - talldatethrow 3y ago
      If a homeless person said "you're a loser and a failure! You disgust me!", would you really care? I think not. Apply that to every other idiot. Unless what they're saying is actually true, well then that's up to you. I've been a bit fat before. A few people, friends and my mother, called me out on it. It was a helpful reminder that other people see it too. Now I'm not longer fat. Now, if they kept saying it to me daily... I'd think "ok these people are just being mean spirited.. that's not a good person.. and I don't care what mean spirited people have to say because they'll always find something." I think it's a skill worth learning, instead of reminding both victims and their abusers that the words do matter. It hurts the victims more and empowers the abusers.
  - enterprise_cog 3y ago
    You do realize that both things are possible, right? You can recognize what people say to you isn’t worth reacting to and that you can choose your words to better respect others.
    - talldatethrow 3y ago
      Who do you want to spend your time on? The abusers in hopes of teaching them "your words matter, you're so powerful, so be nice" or spend your time teaching the nice kids "don't listen to the mean people, they are weak and stupid"? I think it's better to help the nicer kids.
- Minor49er 3y ago
  In game? Like what?
_jplc 3y ago
> We need the opposite of safe spaces We need the option to not deal with scumbags or become one with them. Playing a game you like shouldn’t be tied to a lobby full of red-bull fueled monkeys if you don’t want to.
- junofan 3y ago
  Ironically after reading Microsoft’s guidelines I’m not sure you could get away with calling other players “monkeys.”
  - tekla 3y ago
    Damn, probably deserves a ban.
  - lostmsu 3y ago
    The speech police types rarely imagine they can get hit by their own medicine. Or self-reflect about possibility of being hypocritical.
    - PaulHoule 3y ago
      My #1 complaint about Mastodon is the people who call almost anybody a fascist, including: * Donald Trump (Ok, there was Jan 6) * The neighbors of the homeless colony that are worried about the explosion that killed somebody (really!) * The police that are investigating the murder of a resident of the homeless colony and who have just cracked the case of the manager of a homeless shelter who was killed decades ago * The 80% of the population that is concerned about transgender athletes in woman's sports (see Q33 in https://static.foxnews.com/foxnews.com/content/uploads/2023/04/Fox_April-21-24-2023_National_Topline_April-26-Release.pdf https://static.foxnews.com/foxnews.com/content/uploads/2023/...) even though about 81% of people agree with the recent Supreme Court decision to outlaw workplace discrimination against LGBTQ people (see Table 12 https://law.marquette.edu/poll/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/MLSPSC15CourtIssuesPressRelease.pdf https://law.marquette.edu/poll/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/ML...) Frankly that talk bugs me out, it's the kind of othering and dehumanization that fascists were famous for. There are a lot of other words you can use for authoritarians, assholes, etc. Some of them will argue to no end that the left is always right and how it's completely wrong to apply universal standards to everyone's behavior. I could tell them their behavior causes problems for my (now known) neurodivergence and that they shouldn't be so ableist but they keep arguing and I don't have the energy for it. I used to block those people on sight, then I realized I could be proactive and use keyword filters, it's really good for my piece of mind and I get to enjoy all the nice people on Mastodon.
enterprise_cog 3y ago
A bunch of socially inept nerds hurling insults and derogatory shit at each other isn’t something to be romanticized or nostalgic for. Even if it were, it’s laughable to compare it to any kind of physical fighting club. Your post is so absurd it reads like satire almost, so sorry if that went over my head.
- _jplc 3y ago
  https://img.ifunny.co/images/83c1579a4a697acc558a1d2ee26528c26e649e32c7567eaba4a189c88f21ec31_1.jpg https://img.ifunny.co/images/83c1579a4a697acc558a1d2ee26528c...
EA-3167 3y ago
People really didn't understand the message and themes of Fight Club, did they? The irony that a movie about the failures of modernity and toxic masculinity has become a beacon for people who missed that fact... it's such a strange and twisted world.
matheusmoreira 3y ago
It feels like anonymous imageboards are the only remaining examples of such places.
archagon 3y ago
Bullshit. I grew up in these spaces too. I remember people spamming the n-word, harassing women until they quit the game, and spraying goatse and CSAM on the wall. It was, in retrospect, a disgusting pigsty. The only reprieve was community servers where assholes were not tolerated, but it was an endless battle against the rising tide.

junofan 3y ago

Kids have gotten way more into other forms of bullying AFAICT.

talldatethrow 3y ago
I'm dating a middle school teacher right now. And she tries so hard to stop bullying, constantly trying to show videos and have discussions about how "words matter!!!! Choose your words carefully!!" On and on. I told her.. why don't you teach kids the truth.. the words don't matter. If a someone calls you stupid, and you aren't, who cares? If a bum calls me a loser, do I get upset? I move on. Only if someone you respect has a critique of you should you even pause for a split second and think about the critique. If some dude calls you fat, personally I would think "what kind of wierdo harps on someone's weight.. there must be something wrong with him. Thus, I don't care what he even says." But we instead teach kids "words matter!" So when they do get teased and bullied, they take the words to heart. So stupid.
- sethaurus 3y ago
  Most people don't have the ability to choose what affects us emotionally. We can learn to build resilience and get less reactive, but we can't just turn off our emotional reactions completely. If you can do that, it sounds great. For most people, they cannot do this and cannot be taught to.
  - apple4ever 3y ago
    I disagree. It's not easy to choose, but it very much is possible, they can do it, and they get much can be taught to do so.
  - talldatethrow 3y ago
    If a homeless person said "you're a loser and a failure! You disgust me!", would you really care? I think not. Apply that to every other idiot. Unless what they're saying is actually true, well then that's up to you. I've been a bit fat before. A few people, friends and my mother, called me out on it. It was a helpful reminder that other people see it too. Now I'm not longer fat. Now, if they kept saying it to me daily... I'd think "ok these people are just being mean spirited.. that's not a good person.. and I don't care what mean spirited people have to say because they'll always find something." I think it's a skill worth learning, instead of reminding both victims and their abusers that the words do matter. It hurts the victims more and empowers the abusers.
- enterprise_cog 3y ago
  You do realize that both things are possible, right? You can recognize what people say to you isn’t worth reacting to and that you can choose your words to better respect others.
  - talldatethrow 3y ago
    Who do you want to spend your time on? The abusers in hopes of teaching them "your words matter, you're so powerful, so be nice" or spend your time teaching the nice kids "don't listen to the mean people, they are weak and stupid"? I think it's better to help the nicer kids.
Minor49er 3y ago
In game? Like what?

_jplc 3y ago

> We need the opposite of safe spaces We need the option to not deal with scumbags or become one with them. Playing a game you like shouldn’t be tied to a lobby full of red-bull fueled monkeys if you don’t want to.

junofan 3y ago
Ironically after reading Microsoft’s guidelines I’m not sure you could get away with calling other players “monkeys.”
- tekla 3y ago
  Damn, probably deserves a ban.
- lostmsu 3y ago
  The speech police types rarely imagine they can get hit by their own medicine. Or self-reflect about possibility of being hypocritical.
  - PaulHoule 3y ago
    My #1 complaint about Mastodon is the people who call almost anybody a fascist, including: * Donald Trump (Ok, there was Jan 6) * The neighbors of the homeless colony that are worried about the explosion that killed somebody (really!) * The police that are investigating the murder of a resident of the homeless colony and who have just cracked the case of the manager of a homeless shelter who was killed decades ago * The 80% of the population that is concerned about transgender athletes in woman's sports (see Q33 in https://static.foxnews.com/foxnews.com/content/uploads/2023/04/Fox_April-21-24-2023_National_Topline_April-26-Release.pdf https://static.foxnews.com/foxnews.com/content/uploads/2023/...) even though about 81% of people agree with the recent Supreme Court decision to outlaw workplace discrimination against LGBTQ people (see Table 12 https://law.marquette.edu/poll/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/MLSPSC15CourtIssuesPressRelease.pdf https://law.marquette.edu/poll/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/ML...) Frankly that talk bugs me out, it's the kind of othering and dehumanization that fascists were famous for. There are a lot of other words you can use for authoritarians, assholes, etc. Some of them will argue to no end that the left is always right and how it's completely wrong to apply universal standards to everyone's behavior. I could tell them their behavior causes problems for my (now known) neurodivergence and that they shouldn't be so ableist but they keep arguing and I don't have the energy for it. I used to block those people on sight, then I realized I could be proactive and use keyword filters, it's really good for my piece of mind and I get to enjoy all the nice people on Mastodon.

enterprise_cog 3y ago

A bunch of socially inept nerds hurling insults and derogatory shit at each other isn’t something to be romanticized or nostalgic for. Even if it were, it’s laughable to compare it to any kind of physical fighting club. Your post is so absurd it reads like satire almost, so sorry if that went over my head.

_jplc 3y ago
https://img.ifunny.co/images/83c1579a4a697acc558a1d2ee26528c26e649e32c7567eaba4a189c88f21ec31_1.jpg https://img.ifunny.co/images/83c1579a4a697acc558a1d2ee26528c...

EA-3167 3y ago

People really didn't understand the message and themes of Fight Club, did they? The irony that a movie about the failures of modernity and toxic masculinity has become a beacon for people who missed that fact... it's such a strange and twisted world.

matheusmoreira 3y ago

It feels like anonymous imageboards are the only remaining examples of such places.

archagon 3y ago

Bullshit. I grew up in these spaces too. I remember people spamming the n-word, harassing women until they quit the game, and spraying goatse and CSAM on the wall. It was, in retrospect, a disgusting pigsty. The only reprieve was community servers where assholes were not tolerated, but it was an endless battle against the rising tide.