I think I have a high difficulty child. My kid has ASD and whew meltdowns and all that label entails. I don't think that I had change my parent much, although

I think I have a high difficulty child. My kid has ASD and whew meltdowns and all that label entails. I don't think that I had change my parent much, although the results I got at first would be considered less than ideal. I agree that consistency is key. My kid wails, screams, and more, but eventually she does come to understand that her actions have zero impact on the rules. The rules are what they are. I also don't have a lot of rules I'll be honest. I really only have 3 core rules and all the rules she gets are all enforcement of those rules. The rules are 1) don't impede my ability to keep you healthy and safe 2) you must be able to operate and be productive within your slice of society 3) you are not allowed to be a direct or indirect physical, mental, or emotional danger to yourself or others. That's it. They seems vague and they're probably abusable, but it gives me a compassion go operate from. It allows me to let things go. There are many things I wish my kid would do, but ultimately when I check The Rules, I find she's not really in violation of breaking anything but my dreams for her or my preference for how I personally want her to live. I think this ideal makes me both a strict and lax parent, but I like the results I'm seeing now. It was a long hard battle at the toddler years, but she's mostly accepted how it goes I think because she can know how it will go. I'm come to believe that having core values and being consistent about their enforcement is the way to deal with kids. As long as you aren't too oppressive and they have some space to act as they please, I think you can eventually get to a good state. I guess we'll see how right I am in a decade lol