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Ok, good question. He was uncritically supportive, as my mother found fault with each new apartment or neighbourhood, making up reasons to move again. He also

Ok, good question. He was uncritically supportive, as my mother found fault with each new apartment or neighbourhood, making up reasons to move again. He also accepted her reasons for moving us to yet another school. And he obviously financed this very expensive habit, so there was never much left over for clothes or anything recreational. The only condition was that his routine would remain undisturbed, and he wouldn't help in any way. So for example, he'd have all his breakfast gear at the ready in the new house, amongst the piles of boxes, from the first morning. And go to work as usual. Other than that very large elephant in the room, they were great parents, no complaints.

xur17 3y ago
> The only condition was that his routine would remain undisturbed, and he wouldn't help in any way. So for example, he'd have all his breakfast gear at the ready in the new house, amongst the piles of boxes, from the first morning. And go to work as usual. I shouldn't laugh, but I'm just picturing your dad sitting amongst the chaos casually eating his breakfast cereal totally unphased by it all.
- atlantic 3y ago
  If the furniture was still piled up, there'd be a folding table and chair for him, in an open space between the piles of boxes. He'd have his own milk and pot, coffee and filters, toaster, breadboard, breadknife, butterknife, teaspoon and mug. He was a very generous man, but these objects he didn't share. The breakfast ritual took several hours, and involved a Swedish exercise routine near an open window, interspersed with reading the news and breakfast itself. The reading was not strictly passive, as it involved marking various articles with a thick red pencil, and then cutting them out, folding the cuttings, and saving a select few into his wallet for later reading.
  - clove 3y ago
    Seems to have had some healthy habits and a positive mindset, so... What led to his death?
jstarfish 3y ago
Thanks for sharing! Your account is disturbingly relatable. Even: > The only condition was that his routine would remain undisturbed, and he wouldn't help in any way. This is totally where I'm at. I can't keep up with the churn and refuse to facilitate it anymore. I started to suspect a disorder of some kind once moving countries altogether became the new goal, but outside of cults moving around to sever family/community ties I've never even heard of this being a thing before. I know I will kill myself if this started up again after going to that much trouble.
- AnimalMuppet 3y ago
  > I know I will kill myself if this started up again after going to that much trouble. I don't know if this is hyperbole, or an actual assessment of the situation you're in, but... please don't. Get out if you have to, but don't get out that way.
  - jstarfish 3y ago
    I appreciate your concern, but it's an assessment of a prospective situation I'd be putting myself in. I figure it's best to avoid it rather than test my resilience.

xur17 3y ago

> The only condition was that his routine would remain undisturbed, and he wouldn't help in any way. So for example, he'd have all his breakfast gear at the ready in the new house, amongst the piles of boxes, from the first morning. And go to work as usual. I shouldn't laugh, but I'm just picturing your dad sitting amongst the chaos casually eating his breakfast cereal totally unphased by it all.

atlantic 3y ago
If the furniture was still piled up, there'd be a folding table and chair for him, in an open space between the piles of boxes. He'd have his own milk and pot, coffee and filters, toaster, breadboard, breadknife, butterknife, teaspoon and mug. He was a very generous man, but these objects he didn't share. The breakfast ritual took several hours, and involved a Swedish exercise routine near an open window, interspersed with reading the news and breakfast itself. The reading was not strictly passive, as it involved marking various articles with a thick red pencil, and then cutting them out, folding the cuttings, and saving a select few into his wallet for later reading.
- clove 3y ago
  Seems to have had some healthy habits and a positive mindset, so... What led to his death?

jstarfish 3y ago

Thanks for sharing! Your account is disturbingly relatable. Even: > The only condition was that his routine would remain undisturbed, and he wouldn't help in any way. This is totally where I'm at. I can't keep up with the churn and refuse to facilitate it anymore. I started to suspect a disorder of some kind once moving countries altogether became the new goal, but outside of cults moving around to sever family/community ties I've never even heard of this being a thing before. I know I will kill myself if this started up again after going to that much trouble.

AnimalMuppet 3y ago
> I know I will kill myself if this started up again after going to that much trouble. I don't know if this is hyperbole, or an actual assessment of the situation you're in, but... please don't. Get out if you have to, but don't get out that way.
- jstarfish 3y ago
  I appreciate your concern, but it's an assessment of a prospective situation I'd be putting myself in. I figure it's best to avoid it rather than test my resilience.