I'm no great looker but I think there's a bit of opposite-sex-amicability that's like athleticism - some have more than others and it's gone before you realize

I'm no great looker but I think there's a bit of opposite-sex-amicability that's like athleticism - some have more than others and it's gone before you realize it's special. In all honesty I was a bit lonely in my 20s. I had very bad anxiety through college and didn't forge as many strong friendships in college as might be normal. Maybe it was a touch of desperation but I just went to NYC bars and shows and talked to people. Maybe 90% of what a woman is trying to establish is that you're not a creep or an asshat and I was pretty good at passing that test. I would not like to have to run that gauntlet today.