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> Edit: for those that think this is just some personal issue, you should look up divorce stats by number of previous sexual partners. There is a clear rise in
by naasking 3y ago
> Edit: for those that think this is just some personal issue, you should look up divorce stats by number of previous sexual partners. There is a clear rise in divorce rate per increase in partners, and at about 7 it's 50%+.
You say this like it's obviously a bad thing. People who stay married might just do so because they're afraid of being alone, and so suffer in silence for the rest of their lives. People who have been through many relationships maybe know they'll be ok if they split, it's not the end of the world, and there's no point prolonging the suffering.
You can spin it many different, perfectly valid ways. Most people will probably post-rationalize their choice as "good" anyway, because that's what people do. Those who say married for a long time will say it was the best decision they could have made despite the challenges, and those who split will do the same.
- splintercell 3y ago> People who stay married might just do so because they're afraid of being alone, and so suffer in silence for the rest of their lives. People who have been through many relationships maybe know they'll be ok if they split I used to think that, esp after seeing the unhappy but still together couples in my parent's generation. But the main issue is that now as I'm older and have a bunch of friends the second category now, and the unhappy couples in my parent's generation are (relatively) happily co-grandparenting together. Whereas this late-30s divorced/never-settled couples are equally (if not more) miserable as some of those unhappy couples were in my parent's generation. I don't know what will happen to my divorced/never-settled friends when they reach the grandpa generations without grandkids, but most likely they will find similar people like each other to give each other company. I do trust them that they will do something to be happy.
- naasking 3y ago> Whereas this late-30s divorced/never-settled couples are equally (if not more) miserable as some of those unhappy couples were in my parent's generation. People make their own misery though. The cultural pressures to pair up are strong, so if you focus on things you don't have and think you want because of cultural pressures, of course you'll be miserable. Studies have shown that single people in midlife become significantly happier, I'd argue because a lot of the pressure is then off, and you're free to pursue your real happiness.
- mensetmanusman 3y agoIt’s statistically bad for the children, worse than a death of a parent surprisingly.
- naasking 3y agoI expect that depends on how acrimonious the split.