3 ms·

> Because people pay for cam girls to have a sense of power. I dated someone who did cam work. From what I remember there were people who just wanted to feel l

> Because people pay for cam girls to have a sense of power. I dated someone who did cam work. From what I remember there were people who just wanted to feel like they were in control, but most of her clients were mostly after the feeling of intimacy of doing something with another person and talking to them. You hear similar stories of from other sex workers.

noduerme 3y ago
>> mostly after the feeling of intimacy of doing something with another person and talking to them This is called "topping from the bottom". They're paying her, therefore they're in charge, and expecting to get the emotional payout they've put her in the position of giving them. My gf was a professional dominatrix for 10 years and a stripper before that. The vast majority of men who engage those services are (by their own claim) just looking for - as you put it - feelings of intimacy. But it's not really limited to that. Why? Because their notion of intimacy is bound with ownership. This is a very difficult thing for us men to acknowledge, but it's fundamentally true. I mean: I can't ever be really intimate - completely intimate - with a woman I don't own, or who doesn't own me. The boundaries of power and control are so closely tied with the boundaries of sexual intimacy that the mere interplay between the two systems gives rise to an entire category of labor, i.e. sex work; which is differentiated into simple physical jobs versus psychological ones like domineering. This is what fucking billionaires pay for. It's not to be put in their place by a lowly "sex worker" - it's to be put in their place with proof that they are no better than this girl off the street. Cam work is humiliating because you can't assail the dude. It leads to wrong conclusions on both sides about, for instance, who's actually in charge.

3 ms·

> Because people pay for cam girls to have a sense of power. I dated someone who did cam work. From what I remember there were people who just wanted to feel l

by rimunroe 3y ago

noduerme 3y ago
>> mostly after the feeling of intimacy of doing something with another person and talking to them This is called "topping from the bottom". They're paying her, therefore they're in charge, and expecting to get the emotional payout they've put her in the position of giving them. My gf was a professional dominatrix for 10 years and a stripper before that. The vast majority of men who engage those services are (by their own claim) just looking for - as you put it - feelings of intimacy. But it's not really limited to that. Why? Because their notion of intimacy is bound with ownership. This is a very difficult thing for us men to acknowledge, but it's fundamentally true. I mean: I can't ever be really intimate - completely intimate - with a woman I don't own, or who doesn't own me. The boundaries of power and control are so closely tied with the boundaries of sexual intimacy that the mere interplay between the two systems gives rise to an entire category of labor, i.e. sex work; which is differentiated into simple physical jobs versus psychological ones like domineering. This is what fucking billionaires pay for. It's not to be put in their place by a lowly "sex worker" - it's to be put in their place with proof that they are no better than this girl off the street. Cam work is humiliating because you can't assail the dude. It leads to wrong conclusions on both sides about, for instance, who's actually in charge.