5 ms·

This is so sad. I think there is an underdiscussed crisis with some segments of men.

JKCalhoun 3y ago
It was hard to read. I'm here (wincing in imagined pain) shouting, "No! What if it is irreversible?! What if your dick gets screwed up?!" I confess that after reading it I began to feel that it is even unethical to be in the penis-enlargement field.
MildRant 3y ago
Men have a lot of problems that are under discussed and swept under the rug. Loneliness issues, confidence issues, perception issues, issues with men thinking their life doesn't matter to just name a few. The suicide rate among men is so high for a lot of reasons.
- Two4 3y ago
  Suicide rate is around 4 times higher for men in Western societies, but suicide attempts by women are at least twice that of men. More lethal, messier suicide methods are more popular among men, and in my opinion, it's because women are socialised to be more considerate of those who will find their body.
AtlasBarfed 3y ago
It will continue to be underdiscussed unless there is big money in it. Males are disposable genetically and evolutionarily.
localplume 3y ago
when making fun of a man's penis size for whatever reason becomes normalized, it isn't surprising body dysmorphia becomes more prevalent. double standards galore. mens issues just don't matter.
- maxbond 3y ago
  I dunno about you, but the only people who have ever made fun of my penis were other men, and every woman I've known who called herself a feminist cared about men's issues. I first learned about the inequities in child custody impacting men from one. This isn't a "double standard," it's what feminists have been saying for a long time, that these rigid gender roles hurt everyone (though women in particular do bear the brunt of it).
  - DangitBobby 3y ago
    You've really never heard a woman say men with big trucks are "compensating for something" or any other put-downs related to penis size for perceived macho or overtly masculine behavior? Here, I'll give you a segment of a Netflix special where a woman makes fun of a past boyfriend with a micropenis, does that count? Some of the audience laughs but it doesn't kill TBF. Starts at the 2 minute mark. 1. https://youtu.be/QQXGEd-8Hws https://youtu.be/QQXGEd-8Hws
    - maxbond 3y ago
      Oh I've heard song lyrics and standup jokes and lines in movies and TV shows, sure. I was talking about my personal experience. (I did laugh at the Ali Wong joke, but I won't go to bat for it or anything, it is a joke about stereotypes and insecurity. And the follow up jokes didn't land for me because they got mean.) I'm sure I've heard men and women make "compensating" jokes, I don't remember any particular instances and have no idea about the proportion. Experiences will differ, but I think it's a mistake to attribute the policing of masculinity to women primarily. I'm sure there is far too much of that, but a lot of it (in my personal experience, most) comes from other men, and at any rate blaming women is unproductive. The culprit is suffocatingly rigid ideas about gender, and it's a problem for all of us.
AgentOrange1234 3y ago
This vaguely reminds me of self-image problems vs. unreasonably beauty standards that we mainly associate with young women. It’s definitely quite different in that everyone in public sees a girl’s face and the shape of her body, whereas penises are hidden by default. Also the “toxic” standard for women is everywhere across media, whereas excepting pure pornography penises are rarely and briefly shown. But these stories are so sad. These men feel ashamed of their bodies for not “measuring up” — is this phrase itself perhaps a link between penis size and masculinity/value that is ingrained into our very language? There has been a big effort for years to call out the harms of, e.g., airbrushing in advertising, to push for including more plus-sized models, and to generally expand the notion of beauty for women. I don’t think there’s any such effort to claim that, say, all penises are beautiful, all men are attractive, and so on. The mere suggestion seems utterly foreign to our conception of manhood. We have billionaires and presidents still boasting about their penises. What a crazy thing to make a point of pride and shame.
- TheCapeGreek 3y ago
  With men it may be hidden, but it affects "measuring up" as you say in exactly the way that matters to most straight men: having more (or even any!) sexual partners, especially as supposedly they're having less sex than ever[0]. It's one of the many factors in the toolbox fallacy: "If only I was 'big' enough, I'd be more confident with women". [0]https://www.healthline.com/health-news/young-adults-especially-men-having-sex-less-frequently https://www.healthline.com/health-news/young-adults-especial...
  - whimsicalism 3y ago
    I don't think it really impacts how many sexual partners you will have. Maybe repeats? But even then, doubt it. Preferences are disparate.
    - TheCapeGreek 3y ago
      Like mumblemumble said - it's not about the reality. It's the assumption of "I'll be enough when X". "Repeats" are more likely an outcome of overall performance beyond size (though depending on the partner's preference, it will assist).

It was hard to read. I'm here (wincing in imagined pain) shouting, "No! What if it is irreversible?! What if your dick gets screwed up?!" I confess that after reading it I began to feel that it is even unethical to be in the penis-enlargement field.

MildRant 3y ago

Men have a lot of problems that are under discussed and swept under the rug. Loneliness issues, confidence issues, perception issues, issues with men thinking their life doesn't matter to just name a few. The suicide rate among men is so high for a lot of reasons.

Two4 3y ago
Suicide rate is around 4 times higher for men in Western societies, but suicide attempts by women are at least twice that of men. More lethal, messier suicide methods are more popular among men, and in my opinion, it's because women are socialised to be more considerate of those who will find their body.

AtlasBarfed 3y ago

It will continue to be underdiscussed unless there is big money in it. Males are disposable genetically and evolutionarily.

localplume 3y ago

when making fun of a man's penis size for whatever reason becomes normalized, it isn't surprising body dysmorphia becomes more prevalent. double standards galore. mens issues just don't matter.

maxbond 3y ago
I dunno about you, but the only people who have ever made fun of my penis were other men, and every woman I've known who called herself a feminist cared about men's issues. I first learned about the inequities in child custody impacting men from one. This isn't a "double standard," it's what feminists have been saying for a long time, that these rigid gender roles hurt everyone (though women in particular do bear the brunt of it).
- DangitBobby 3y ago
  You've really never heard a woman say men with big trucks are "compensating for something" or any other put-downs related to penis size for perceived macho or overtly masculine behavior? Here, I'll give you a segment of a Netflix special where a woman makes fun of a past boyfriend with a micropenis, does that count? Some of the audience laughs but it doesn't kill TBF. Starts at the 2 minute mark. 1. https://youtu.be/QQXGEd-8Hws https://youtu.be/QQXGEd-8Hws
  - maxbond 3y ago
    Oh I've heard song lyrics and standup jokes and lines in movies and TV shows, sure. I was talking about my personal experience. (I did laugh at the Ali Wong joke, but I won't go to bat for it or anything, it is a joke about stereotypes and insecurity. And the follow up jokes didn't land for me because they got mean.) I'm sure I've heard men and women make "compensating" jokes, I don't remember any particular instances and have no idea about the proportion. Experiences will differ, but I think it's a mistake to attribute the policing of masculinity to women primarily. I'm sure there is far too much of that, but a lot of it (in my personal experience, most) comes from other men, and at any rate blaming women is unproductive. The culprit is suffocatingly rigid ideas about gender, and it's a problem for all of us.

AgentOrange1234 3y ago

This vaguely reminds me of self-image problems vs. unreasonably beauty standards that we mainly associate with young women. It’s definitely quite different in that everyone in public sees a girl’s face and the shape of her body, whereas penises are hidden by default. Also the “toxic” standard for women is everywhere across media, whereas excepting pure pornography penises are rarely and briefly shown. But these stories are so sad. These men feel ashamed of their bodies for not “measuring up” — is this phrase itself perhaps a link between penis size and masculinity/value that is ingrained into our very language? There has been a big effort for years to call out the harms of, e.g., airbrushing in advertising, to push for including more plus-sized models, and to generally expand the notion of beauty for women. I don’t think there’s any such effort to claim that, say, all penises are beautiful, all men are attractive, and so on. The mere suggestion seems utterly foreign to our conception of manhood. We have billionaires and presidents still boasting about their penises. What a crazy thing to make a point of pride and shame.

TheCapeGreek 3y ago
With men it may be hidden, but it affects "measuring up" as you say in exactly the way that matters to most straight men: having more (or even any!) sexual partners, especially as supposedly they're having less sex than ever[0]. It's one of the many factors in the toolbox fallacy: "If only I was 'big' enough, I'd be more confident with women". [0]https://www.healthline.com/health-news/young-adults-especially-men-having-sex-less-frequently https://www.healthline.com/health-news/young-adults-especial...
- whimsicalism 3y ago
  I don't think it really impacts how many sexual partners you will have. Maybe repeats? But even then, doubt it. Preferences are disparate.
  - TheCapeGreek 3y ago
    Like mumblemumble said - it's not about the reality. It's the assumption of "I'll be enough when X". "Repeats" are more likely an outcome of overall performance beyond size (though depending on the partner's preference, it will assist).