> we do have a small "fun money" monthly budget item for each of us that is a black box. This is what we have done, but it's been a gradual process (starting b

> we do have a small "fun money" monthly budget item for each of us that is a black box. This is what we have done, but it's been a gradual process (starting before we got married) of moving our shared expenses to a joint account, and that "fun money" is just kept in our own separate checking accounts. That way we can keep a tight eye on our joint spending and savings goals, but don't have to worry about each other's spending preferences (within agreed limits).