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I think that's a pretty astute observation. Visiting the UK (from the US) it was pretty clear that the social boundaries were different, but the general nature
by letitbeirie 3y ago
I think that's a pretty astute observation.
Visiting the UK (from the US) it was pretty clear that the social boundaries were different, but the general nature of the game was the same - we're both guess cultures: you have to figure out what to say and how to say it.
In the Netherlands, conversation seemed much more unguarded. It's hard to describe but it's similar to a concept in the US of someone "having no filter" - basically, less verbal softening of uncomfortable/taboo subjects and more willingness to engage with them.
I actually find the Dutch way very refreshing in some ways. Soliciting critiques (e.g. "how does my new haircut look?") is a largely pointless exercise in the US because there's strong social pressure to say "it looks great" whether it's true or not.
I do wonder though if the Dutch way of making friends (as adults at least) has to be wildly different than in the Anglosphere, given how big a role those subtle social cues play here.
- yumraj 3y agoThe above comment reminds me of Jan Maas in Ted Lasso. :)
- falloutx 3y agoI don't know if its just me, but I personally never had a no-filter conversation in this country. Like if I ask someone about my hair or something, they always answer politely. There is still enough social pressure not to say a bad thing about other people. If I ask a question, the answer is always something which would be considered polite. May be not American polite, but still polite imo.