A lot of "problem solving" involving kids means "making the problem go away from the adult's life". E.g. a situation I see played out is kids being told to res

A lot of "problem solving" involving kids means "making the problem go away from the adult's life". E.g. a situation I see played out is kids being told to respond to bullying by acting like they don't care (good advice as far as it goes). If the bullying continues, we hear it isn't a problem because the kids says he doesn't care - which is what we told him to say, true or not. In any case, the problem is solved from the adult's POV - the bullying complaint has disappeared, ticket is moved to resolved. The bullied child now faces his problem alone. Receiving this kind of "support" discourages reaching out for help. (I'm not saying this is specific to boys, don't read too much into pronouns.)