A lot of these studies may be culturally specific, in that the focus is on the fulfillment of the individual, i.e. the thinking is 'what's best for me' rather t

A lot of these studies may be culturally specific, in that the focus is on the fulfillment of the individual, i.e. the thinking is 'what's best for me' rather than 'what's best for the group'. Consider that if you're feeling depressed and lonely and otherwise miserable, and seek out the company of others to alleviate your own negative emotional state, then you're essentially treating other people like a drug you take to improve your mood. Others will tend to see you as needy, demanding, a downer, etc. The solution is to first figure out how to be happy on your own, to improve your mental and emotional state, such that other people find your company pleasant and agreeable - then they'll actually want to share your company. It's a bit like physical hygiene - if you smell bad, people will keep their distance. Mental hygiene is the same concept. Unfortunately, consumer society is based on exploiting people's negative emotional states to improve sales - go shopping to alleviate loneliness, buy a bottle of pills to improve your mood, etc. It's not a very healthy system, and it's not surprising many people are so alienated.