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The fact that parents even consider giving kids phones before 8th grade is baffling to me. Growing up, I got a dumb cellphone around that age and it feels like
by voidhorse 3y ago
The fact that parents even consider giving kids phones before 8th grade is baffling to me. Growing up, I got a dumb cellphone around that age and it feels like an appropriate time. The internet is just too wild to let anyone younger than at least 13 go near it imo. What's especially unfortunate about it is that I get the sense most parents that hand out phones earlier could have just gotten their kid some handheld gaming system (there's even new ones on the market and retro recreations these days!) instead and managed to solve the exact same "problem" with basically none of the psychological and developmental risks.
Comes with the huge typical disclaimer that I am not a parent in this environment so obviously I don't know how real the pressure feels.
- wpietri 3y agoThe problem parents often solve with a phone is not fun, but contact. When they are away from their kid, they want to know where the kid is, to be able to talk to them, and to have the kid able to call them. This is often especially important to divorced parents, who want to be able to contact the kid directly when at the other parent's house. The problem a kid often solves with the phone is also not fun, but social connection to friends.
- voidhorse 3y agoThat makes sense. In that case it seems like the best thing would be a dumb phone, not a smart phone. Or, if a smartphone, one that's pretty limited in range of functionality, at least.
- flatline 3y agoMy ex tried that with my daughter. She was mortified by the dumb phone and would not take it with her or keep it charged. I cannot say that I blame her, it was just there so her mom could reach out to her whenever she liked. No benefit to the kid. I got her a smart phone at age 12, going into 6th grade. She has to take the bus to school from my place. Sometimes she misses the bus and walks 2 miles home - sometimes with a friend, sometimes solo. The phone is a huge safety factor in all of this, I don’t know what I’d do without it. There are no pay phones. Waiting till the 8th grade feels like it’s coming from a place of tremendous privilege to me. That’s great if you can swing it!
- voidhorse 3y agoYeah, it does seem like it'd be really circumstantial. Everyone's situations are different. That's kind of one of the big underlying problems with tech, it spreads virally and then becomes the baseline, even when that baseline harbors a bunch of potentially negative effects. I'm not surprised at all to hear that no kid today would want to be the weirdo with the dumb phone.
- vxNsr 3y agoGiving a child a smartphone is coming from a place of tremendous privilege. Phone plans aren’t cheap, phones aren’t cheap (at least phones that are usable aren’t). It’s baffling to me that you solved your problem by giving your child an incredibly addicting device that most child development experts compare to hard drugs.