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> In the US, the waiters are constantly interrupting and bugging the customers, hoping for a bigger tip. In Europe and Japan, this doesn't happen; you need to s

> In the US, the waiters are constantly interrupting and bugging the customers, hoping for a bigger tip. In Europe and Japan, this doesn't happen; you need to signal to your server that you need something... There are restaurants in Seattle that I've stopped visiting for anything beyond takeaway because my wife and I can't hold a conversation for more than a few minutes without being interrupted. It is very frustrating. On the other hand, when we have taken friends to the places we like that are far more laid back, at least one person has commented on how the service is "poor" or "inattentive." I think we are culturally used to being asked if we need service and are reticent to go find help or do for ourselves (except when it comes to using a machine at the grocery). So I'm not sure it's solely in search of a better tip, except that everything in a US restaurant is for that. Foodservice in Europe, broadly, is one of those amazing but unexpected things I tell people who are preparing to travel for the first time to really look at and try to enjoy. It's wonderful, in my opinion.

midoridensha 3y ago
>On the other hand, when we have taken friends to the places we like that are far more laid back, at least one person has commented on how the service is "poor" or "inattentive." This is the problem. Most American diners actually want the server to act like their best friend and constantly interrupt them. People like you are a minority. >Foodservice in Europe, broadly, is one of those amazing but unexpected things I tell people who are preparing to travel for the first time to really look at and try to enjoy. It's wonderful, in my opinion. I love it too, and the service here in Japan, but most Americans would hate it I think.
- liotier 3y ago
  > Most American diners actually want the server to act like their best friend and constantly interrupt them Seriously ? Don't Americans see how fake it is ? The French waiter does its job curtly and efficiently, neither him nor I pretend we are fond of each other and that is perfectly fine.
  - bombcar 3y ago
    I just want my drinks kept relatively full, and if all that’s needed for that is a raised eyebrow or a nod, that doesn’t bother me. The key is perfecting the “walk slowly past checking” without verbally interrupting.
  - midoridensha 3y ago
    >Don't Americans see how fake it is ? I guess not. Many Americans want to be treated like they're royalty anyway; just look at how entitled they act in public. Expecting some server to wait on them hand and foot without even being asked is part of the entitlement mentality that is prevalent in America, I think.
  - wrp 3y ago
    When I eat in a restaurant, I want to be left in peace, so I prefer the Japanese restaurant experience. But I know I'm not the rule in America, maybe not even in the majority. If you watch American diners, it's clear that many enjoy the social interaction. Some will even sit at the counter instead of at a table in order to get more of it. My impression is that the waitresses who are good at maintaining banter with the customers are the ones who draw the most in tips.

midoridensha 3y ago

>On the other hand, when we have taken friends to the places we like that are far more laid back, at least one person has commented on how the service is "poor" or "inattentive." This is the problem. Most American diners actually want the server to act like their best friend and constantly interrupt them. People like you are a minority. >Foodservice in Europe, broadly, is one of those amazing but unexpected things I tell people who are preparing to travel for the first time to really look at and try to enjoy. It's wonderful, in my opinion. I love it too, and the service here in Japan, but most Americans would hate it I think.

liotier 3y ago
> Most American diners actually want the server to act like their best friend and constantly interrupt them Seriously ? Don't Americans see how fake it is ? The French waiter does its job curtly and efficiently, neither him nor I pretend we are fond of each other and that is perfectly fine.
- bombcar 3y ago
  I just want my drinks kept relatively full, and if all that’s needed for that is a raised eyebrow or a nod, that doesn’t bother me. The key is perfecting the “walk slowly past checking” without verbally interrupting.
- midoridensha 3y ago
  >Don't Americans see how fake it is ? I guess not. Many Americans want to be treated like they're royalty anyway; just look at how entitled they act in public. Expecting some server to wait on them hand and foot without even being asked is part of the entitlement mentality that is prevalent in America, I think.
- wrp 3y ago
  When I eat in a restaurant, I want to be left in peace, so I prefer the Japanese restaurant experience. But I know I'm not the rule in America, maybe not even in the majority. If you watch American diners, it's clear that many enjoy the social interaction. Some will even sit at the counter instead of at a table in order to get more of it. My impression is that the waitresses who are good at maintaining banter with the customers are the ones who draw the most in tips.