It sounds like your brain has been wired in a very specific way. Perhaps it could use reprogramming? One option is psilocybin therapy. It's supposed to be able

It sounds like your brain has been wired in a very specific way. Perhaps it could use reprogramming? One option is psilocybin therapy. It's supposed to be able to make this underlying wiring more malleable in a way that can lead you to having more contentment and joy in life.