I feel sad for you. Your lessons are good ones but you don’t mention at all whether or not you’ve had any formal mental health care eg therapy, counselling, psy

I feel sad for you. Your lessons are good ones but you don’t mention at all whether or not you’ve had any formal mental health care eg therapy, counselling, psychiatry. Without wanting to turn this thread into a flame war on the merits or not of medical intervention, I can strongly recommend the benefits of active, continuing and ongoing mental health care. No one is an island and the belief that we are all meant to solve our own problems single-handedly is a lie. Asking for help is probably the bravest thing you can do. All the best.