3 ms·

Tell HN: Homeless Burnout in a State of Ruin

Burned out software developer here. I dropped out of engineering to do music, then wound up surviving via software development jobs from my mid-20’s. Now mid-40’s, alone, homeless, ruined, burned out and dropped out. Lessons learned: * stay close to family and friends where possible * forget principle: don’t burn bridges * keep your private life off SOCMED * take early adopter opportunities as they arise * forgive self and others I struggle constantly with suicidal ideation, with phases of persistent 24/7 suicidal ideation with insomnia. I’ve been alone for every major holiday for about a decade now. When I try programming, I am overcome with stress now. I haven’t been able to complete suicide. Take care of your health: your body, mind, ears, eyes and relationships. Be well.

frendiversity 3y ago
I feel you, almost there myself. Thanks for the advice. I'll pray for you.
karkehan 3y ago
Those are worthy lessons, that too few realize too late. I also have been where you are - on the edge of a cliff about to leap. Life is cruel, and most people more so. The hard lesson is that life is a war - every day a battle to survive. Don't succumb to the darkness. Never give in, never surrender, ever. Find the fight deep within and forge a soul that is stronger from your trials. Find the good people in the world, those that care, who are gentle and kind. They can help rebuild your confidence and give you direction. The lessons they teach can forge you into a similar soul. You and the world will be better for it.
phs318u 3y ago
I feel sad for you. Your lessons are good ones but you don’t mention at all whether or not you’ve had any formal mental health care eg therapy, counselling, psychiatry. Without wanting to turn this thread into a flame war on the merits or not of medical intervention, I can strongly recommend the benefits of active, continuing and ongoing mental health care. No one is an island and the belief that we are all meant to solve our own problems single-handedly is a lie. Asking for help is probably the bravest thing you can do. All the best.
- homelessburnout 3y ago
  Sure, I speak to a therapist. Separate, but related: I also have an agenda to push via protest, not here of course.

frendiversity 3y ago

I feel you, almost there myself. Thanks for the advice. I'll pray for you.

karkehan 3y ago

Those are worthy lessons, that too few realize too late. I also have been where you are - on the edge of a cliff about to leap. Life is cruel, and most people more so. The hard lesson is that life is a war - every day a battle to survive. Don't succumb to the darkness. Never give in, never surrender, ever. Find the fight deep within and forge a soul that is stronger from your trials. Find the good people in the world, those that care, who are gentle and kind. They can help rebuild your confidence and give you direction. The lessons they teach can forge you into a similar soul. You and the world will be better for it.

phs318u 3y ago

I feel sad for you. Your lessons are good ones but you don’t mention at all whether or not you’ve had any formal mental health care eg therapy, counselling, psychiatry. Without wanting to turn this thread into a flame war on the merits or not of medical intervention, I can strongly recommend the benefits of active, continuing and ongoing mental health care. No one is an island and the belief that we are all meant to solve our own problems single-handedly is a lie. Asking for help is probably the bravest thing you can do. All the best.

homelessburnout 3y ago
Sure, I speak to a therapist. Separate, but related: I also have an agenda to push via protest, not here of course.