I don't think this is what you want to hear, but I prefer the first version (ie, picture2.jpg). While there are a few little copy issues, in general, it tells m

I don't think this is what you want to hear, but I prefer the first version (ie, picture2.jpg). While there are a few little copy issues, in general, it tells me what I need to know without feeling intimidating. Your new version felt intimidating - I knew I wanted to read it so I could help you, but I was nervous to get started! If you'd like to run your copy by anyone, I've been writing for most of my life. And, my girlfriend is a much better writer than I am. Feel free to email me (I'm pretty sure it is on my profile) and we would be glad to give your stuff a read. Best of luck - this event sounds very cool!!