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Being bipolar, I am acutely aware of managing mental energy. I’m constantly running on the edge of my limit to be functional in society. I can’t borrow energy f
by kayodelycaon 3y ago
Being bipolar, I am acutely aware of managing mental energy. I’m constantly running on the edge of my limit to be functional in society. I can’t borrow energy from tomorrow. I borrow from the next fours.
It seems to be impossible to explain this. People just don’t get it. They are so used to having nearly infinite reserve capacity and assume everyone else does too. I have none. Every time I run out of energy, it’s laziness, carelessness, or a dozen other moral failings because I can’t possibly be different from them.
Fortunately, I’ve been able to convince people I’m doing my best and they are willing to accept something they don’t understand.
- tired-turtle 3y agoCan you elaborate on how you feel you’re borrowing from the next four hours? Do you think this relates to your meds (if any) or your disorder (or both)?
- kayodelycaon 3y agoLooks like I missed a word. It's the next four days. I don't think it has anything to do with my meds. Everyone does this kind of energy borrowing.
- notfish 3y agoI’m guessing you’ve already read it, but I’ll post it for anyone who hasn’t: https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/ https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine... This is my go-to resource for explaining what it’s like to live with chronic illness to healthy loved ones. Christine is far more eloquent than I could ever be.
- underdeserver 3y agoAwesome explanation. I also like that she ends up stealing a spoon from the diner.
- TeMPOraL 3y agoI hate it. It goes entirely against the style of my thinking. It's also very coarse-grained; under this theory, I routinely engage in fractional reserve spoon-banking. It's my go-to explanation anyway, because it hits the sweet spot of being close enough and easy to explain to just about anyone.