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> One day, sitting at my workstation, I stopped typing, stared blankly at the screen for a few seconds, and a switch flipped in my head This was what it was li

> One day, sitting at my workstation, I stopped typing, stared blankly at the screen for a few seconds, and a switch flipped in my head This was what it was like for me, but I also got filled with anger at the same time. Like my brain was doing everything it could to physically stop me from working. I took a week and a half off, but then came back and kept pushing. Now it feels even worse internally. I'm not sure what to do. I could take an extended leave maybe, but time off doesn't seem to be helping. I can sort of push through it right now, but I feel like the more I do that the worse it'll eventually get. I'm in therapy and doing most of the self care things I can. It's keeping me afloat.

Paul-Craft 3y ago
I was there. I took the time off. I needed a year. Came back, got a job that felt meaningful, and things were great, until I got laid off recently lol
capableweb 3y ago
> I took a week and a half off, but then came back and kept pushing. Now it feels even worse internally. I'm not sure what to do. I could take an extended leave maybe, but time off doesn't seem to be helping. I can sort of push through it right now, but I feel like the more I do that the worse it'll eventually get. I tried this way for many years. Work hard for 4-5 years, then one year of relaxation and not working at all. Was fine during the year of relaxation, but at the end of the "work" cycle it always felt like shit. What I found working better is instead being able to have the cycle nailed down for each day + the weekends. Absolutely nothing after 4pm related to work, until I'm back at work in the morning next day. If I even start thinking thoughts related to it, I actively push them away, even if it would be helpful. In the beginning, it was really hard, as I'm used to just walking about and thinking about work. But now after a while, my brain automatically go into leisure mode at 4pm, and it finally feels like I get actual rest between leaving and coming back to work.
- blensor 3y ago
  What also helped me a lot is to deactivate notifications of every communication channel ( email, messenger even the phone ) If notifications are turned on, it feels like other people have control over my mental state, because if an incoming email makes a ping it means that the person that just sent me a message caused my focus to shift in the work I am currently doing. Even if it feels minimal this compounds quite a lot over the course of a day.
  - Reitet00 3y ago
    I'm currently reading "Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention—and How to Think Deeply Again" by Johann Hari and there's an explicit mention of the negative effect on people that immediate notifications bring. Just wanted to mention that it's not only you.
- deleted 3y ago
  [deleted]
Enginerrrd 3y ago
I'm kind of there right now. I really needed a week off in December, and that got delayed 3 times by 3 months of crazy overtime, and something in me just broke. I finished the project but there were a few days in there where it took real fortitude to keep going and put myself in my desk chair. I took a week and a half off, which wasn't anywhere close to enough after that, and after a couple of aimless weeks back, I quit my job and now I'm starting a new one and I set up a month off in between. I don't know that it's been quite enough, but it has helped immensely. I'm going to be taking at least a week off per quarter for better mental health maintenance.
- pseudosudoer 3y ago
  Although I didn't quit my job, having sizeable breaks between different jobs has been quite valuable. Time off between gigs feels more "free" because the expectations aren't the same when the break is finished.
eyelidlessness 3y ago
I'd strongly advise taking the extended leave available to you. Think of it this way: if you’re just staying afloat but still struggling, there’s very little buffer between staying afloat and not; you very likely will take leave one way or another; you’ll be glad you made the choice and didn’t wait for it to be made for you.

Paul-Craft 3y ago

I was there. I took the time off. I needed a year. Came back, got a job that felt meaningful, and things were great, until I got laid off recently lol

capableweb 3y ago

> I took a week and a half off, but then came back and kept pushing. Now it feels even worse internally. I'm not sure what to do. I could take an extended leave maybe, but time off doesn't seem to be helping. I can sort of push through it right now, but I feel like the more I do that the worse it'll eventually get. I tried this way for many years. Work hard for 4-5 years, then one year of relaxation and not working at all. Was fine during the year of relaxation, but at the end of the "work" cycle it always felt like shit. What I found working better is instead being able to have the cycle nailed down for each day + the weekends. Absolutely nothing after 4pm related to work, until I'm back at work in the morning next day. If I even start thinking thoughts related to it, I actively push them away, even if it would be helpful. In the beginning, it was really hard, as I'm used to just walking about and thinking about work. But now after a while, my brain automatically go into leisure mode at 4pm, and it finally feels like I get actual rest between leaving and coming back to work.

blensor 3y ago
What also helped me a lot is to deactivate notifications of every communication channel ( email, messenger even the phone ) If notifications are turned on, it feels like other people have control over my mental state, because if an incoming email makes a ping it means that the person that just sent me a message caused my focus to shift in the work I am currently doing. Even if it feels minimal this compounds quite a lot over the course of a day.
- Reitet00 3y ago
  I'm currently reading "Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention—and How to Think Deeply Again" by Johann Hari and there's an explicit mention of the negative effect on people that immediate notifications bring. Just wanted to mention that it's not only you.
deleted 3y ago
[deleted]

Enginerrrd 3y ago

I'm kind of there right now. I really needed a week off in December, and that got delayed 3 times by 3 months of crazy overtime, and something in me just broke. I finished the project but there were a few days in there where it took real fortitude to keep going and put myself in my desk chair. I took a week and a half off, which wasn't anywhere close to enough after that, and after a couple of aimless weeks back, I quit my job and now I'm starting a new one and I set up a month off in between. I don't know that it's been quite enough, but it has helped immensely. I'm going to be taking at least a week off per quarter for better mental health maintenance.

pseudosudoer 3y ago
Although I didn't quit my job, having sizeable breaks between different jobs has been quite valuable. Time off between gigs feels more "free" because the expectations aren't the same when the break is finished.

eyelidlessness 3y ago

I'd strongly advise taking the extended leave available to you. Think of it this way: if you’re just staying afloat but still struggling, there’s very little buffer between staying afloat and not; you very likely will take leave one way or another; you’ll be glad you made the choice and didn’t wait for it to be made for you.