3 ms·

At least among the single people I know, nobody wants to compromise and they have an inflated sense of themselves. In addition they are using apps that are bas

At least among the single people I know, nobody wants to compromise and they have an inflated sense of themselves. In addition they are using apps that are basically just about sexual interaction and not romantic connection. They aren't even reaching like a 3rd-5th date with most of their prospective partners, let alone thinking about the costs of divorce.

tivert 4y ago
> In addition they are using apps that are basically just about sexual interaction and not romantic connection. "Wouldn't it be great if finding a partner was exactly like shopping, where you hunt around until you find a thing meets all your fussy requirements?", said a disturbingly large percentage of society.
- lotsofpulp 4y ago
  The dating (or mating) market is a great example of a market where agents provide huge value. Both sellers are unable to objectively value what they are selling (themselves), and so agents familiar with them and willing to vouch for them (family, friends, coworkers' spouses, etc) are in prime position to communicate with other agents and come up with reasonable valuations. However, this works as long as the networks remain broad and active, and people participate in them (you need at least some "busybodies"). I can see this being hampered if people frequently move, and move away from friends/family.
  - tivert 4y ago
    If it wasn't clear enough, I was mocking the attitude of viewing it like a market and the people as products. Talking about "sellers" and "reasonable valuations" is taking that attitude to a whole different level. If course, our society is so brain dead it has trouble understanding anything that isn't modeled on shopping in a market. So everything must be converted into "shopping in a market."
    - lotsofpulp 4y ago
      I find it useful to use multiple perspectives to analyze things. In this case, I think viewing it as a market on a population wide level can help explain why it does not work like shopping.
AnimalMuppet 4y ago
In fairness, long before the age of apps, I didn't reach a 3rd-5th date with most of my prospective partners, either...

tivert 4y ago

> In addition they are using apps that are basically just about sexual interaction and not romantic connection. "Wouldn't it be great if finding a partner was exactly like shopping, where you hunt around until you find a thing meets all your fussy requirements?", said a disturbingly large percentage of society.

lotsofpulp 4y ago
The dating (or mating) market is a great example of a market where agents provide huge value. Both sellers are unable to objectively value what they are selling (themselves), and so agents familiar with them and willing to vouch for them (family, friends, coworkers' spouses, etc) are in prime position to communicate with other agents and come up with reasonable valuations. However, this works as long as the networks remain broad and active, and people participate in them (you need at least some "busybodies"). I can see this being hampered if people frequently move, and move away from friends/family.
- tivert 4y ago
  If it wasn't clear enough, I was mocking the attitude of viewing it like a market and the people as products. Talking about "sellers" and "reasonable valuations" is taking that attitude to a whole different level. If course, our society is so brain dead it has trouble understanding anything that isn't modeled on shopping in a market. So everything must be converted into "shopping in a market."
  - lotsofpulp 4y ago
    I find it useful to use multiple perspectives to analyze things. In this case, I think viewing it as a market on a population wide level can help explain why it does not work like shopping.

AnimalMuppet 4y ago

In fairness, long before the age of apps, I didn't reach a 3rd-5th date with most of my prospective partners, either...