4 ms·

For me these are linked. The fact that I’m now expected to answer their stressful crap 24/7 definitely raises my blood pressure.

htag 3y ago
I just leave my cellphone places on purpose. Later I call them back with an excuse like "Sorry, I left my phone in the kitchen and was at my desk." Anyone that calls me regularly knows to expect this. I do keep my phone on and near me during standard business hours, but even then I might not answer a family call and give a work excuse.
- doubled112 3y ago
  I'm not taking the work phone anywhere I don't have to, that's for sure. I get to them when/if I feel it's appropriate. I've had zero problems there so far. I don't always have MY phone on me either, and even if I do I don't always answer. It is this phone where I have the biggest problem with people and boundaries. Sometimes I feel like I'm surrounded by needy children but they're in their 40s, 50s, and 70s. A phone call, a voice mail, a call back, another voice mail to remind me about the first call, maybe a call that night too. Nobody even died. It's not always the same person either. So the next call I do answer will be mostly a shaming about how I don't answer the phone. You're right and your behavior right now is why. Have a nice day mom. Does it sound stressful? I don't care probably even as much as I should, but one day it will be something important but the boy cried wolf too many times and got eaten. Just remember. If you have them, teach your kids that while they may be the main character in their story, they are not the main character in the story, and the difference between the two.
macNchz 3y ago
I think there’s definitely something to this, and it’s insidious because the technological ability to reach someone at any time has built social expectations accordingly. Everyone is reachable all of the time, and the threshold for agitation when someone cannot be reached has never been shorter. I like to spend time in the wilderness, and I’ve thought a lot about this concept of “reachability” and how it contributes to the kind of unique feeling I have when I’m deep in the backcountry. Over time technology has increased the percentage of the day where someone is reachable: home phones became ubiquitous, then answering machines, then cell phones with limited coverage, now cell phones with extremely broad coverage, even on airplanes. Accordingly, most people now assume they can get ahold of you basically whenever. You can try to manage people’s expectations as an individual, but you will be swimming against the current. I think being unreachable sometimes is healthy. Heading into the backcountry with no cell service is an incredibly freeing feeling for me, and one I think many people simply never feel these days.

htag 3y ago

I just leave my cellphone places on purpose. Later I call them back with an excuse like "Sorry, I left my phone in the kitchen and was at my desk." Anyone that calls me regularly knows to expect this. I do keep my phone on and near me during standard business hours, but even then I might not answer a family call and give a work excuse.

doubled112 3y ago
I'm not taking the work phone anywhere I don't have to, that's for sure. I get to them when/if I feel it's appropriate. I've had zero problems there so far. I don't always have MY phone on me either, and even if I do I don't always answer. It is this phone where I have the biggest problem with people and boundaries. Sometimes I feel like I'm surrounded by needy children but they're in their 40s, 50s, and 70s. A phone call, a voice mail, a call back, another voice mail to remind me about the first call, maybe a call that night too. Nobody even died. It's not always the same person either. So the next call I do answer will be mostly a shaming about how I don't answer the phone. You're right and your behavior right now is why. Have a nice day mom. Does it sound stressful? I don't care probably even as much as I should, but one day it will be something important but the boy cried wolf too many times and got eaten. Just remember. If you have them, teach your kids that while they may be the main character in their story, they are not the main character in the story, and the difference between the two.

macNchz 3y ago

I think there’s definitely something to this, and it’s insidious because the technological ability to reach someone at any time has built social expectations accordingly. Everyone is reachable all of the time, and the threshold for agitation when someone cannot be reached has never been shorter. I like to spend time in the wilderness, and I’ve thought a lot about this concept of “reachability” and how it contributes to the kind of unique feeling I have when I’m deep in the backcountry. Over time technology has increased the percentage of the day where someone is reachable: home phones became ubiquitous, then answering machines, then cell phones with limited coverage, now cell phones with extremely broad coverage, even on airplanes. Accordingly, most people now assume they can get ahold of you basically whenever. You can try to manage people’s expectations as an individual, but you will be swimming against the current. I think being unreachable sometimes is healthy. Heading into the backcountry with no cell service is an incredibly freeing feeling for me, and one I think many people simply never feel these days.