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"We are changing the shape of Shopify significantly today to pay unshared attention to our mission." What a way to lead, and what an absolutely grotesque euphe

"We are changing the shape of Shopify significantly today to pay unshared attention to our mission." What a way to lead, and what an absolutely grotesque euphemism (not to mention a barbaricly tortuous use of English). Why do companies write like this? It's just awful. I'm only half-joking when I suggest that if they'd taken this text and asked GPT-4 to rewrite it in a compassionate tone they'd have got a better result. (I say this having used GPT-4 quite regularly in recent weeks, although not for these kinds of purposes. It's quite impressive, along many axes, and I'm confident would have made a decent fist of this piece.) EDIT: All right, I have to give some credit here. I've now had chance to read the full release and, whilst I don't love the RPG-esque references, I understand that this is fundamentally a piece of internal comms sent to a group of people who are probably used to discussing things in those terms (Lord, preserve us - not my bag). That aside, I thought a lot of the rest of the release was decent and the severance terms seem good, so I have to give props for that. I've left my first impression unedited because, if nothing else, it's an honest reaction to some quite poorly composed introductory remarks and on that basis certainly not entirely unfair.

nickstinemates 3y ago
It's written like a prologue for an RPG. Main Quest, Side Quest, Crafters... that's dedication.
- fmajid 3y ago
  To prove it was not written by ChatGPT because no AI is that psychotic, not even SkyNet?
- bartread 3y ago
  It is indeed. Not my bag at all but I've edited my original comment because a lot of the stuff further down, RPG references aside, is decently written, and there clearly is some compassion there. Severance terms are, as these things go, generous as well, and certainly a lot more than many companies would have done.
- jkestner 3y ago
  Not going to defend it, but apparently gaming vernacular is a company thing: https://techcrunch.com/2023/05/04/how-shopify-bungled-its-latest-layoffs-and-made-employees-feel-like-npcs/ https://techcrunch.com/2023/05/04/how-shopify-bungled-its-la...
  - nickstinemates 3y ago
    To be fair, it shows some character/culture/? which makes it stand apart from all of the other corporate releases out there. If it were good news it'd certainly hit different.
mbesto 3y ago
> Why do companies write like this? It's just awful. You aren't the audience, that's why.
- nsoldiac 3y ago
  This. Not to say companies always get comms right, quite the opposite, but there's entire org structures filled with people dedicated to crafting these communications and the decisions about wording and audience are probably debated to death internally. My personal hell, but I have to acknowledge it's existence and purpose.
- azemetre 3y ago
  Who honestly is the audience? Algo traders (not joking here)?
  - mbesto 3y ago
    It's a publicly traded company - mainly investors/analysts.
- AlbertCory 3y ago
  I don't know; every time one of these corpy announcements comes out, I check to see if I have Bingo: https://1fish2.github.io/buzzword-bingo/corp-bingo.html https://1fish2.github.io/buzzword-bingo/corp-bingo.html none yet. Jerry's working on adding weights to the buzzwords.
mikeryan 3y ago
This looks worse out of context. The next sentence is pretty clear on what's going on. There are a number of consequences to this, and I don’t want to bury the lede: after today Shopify will be smaller by about 20% and Flexport will buy Shopify Logistics; this means some of you will leave Shopify today
- agluszak 3y ago
  > Shopify will be smaller by about 20% So are they going to fire 20% of the C-suite and upper management as well? :)
  - mumin 3y ago
    [flagged]
  - steve_adams_86 3y ago
    No, they're the heroes going on the main quest!
  - deltree7 3y ago
    C-Suite are appointed by the Board. If the board thinks they are not doing their job, they will be fired. How is it not difficult to understand for a self-appointed smart crowd?
    - d4mi3n 3y ago
      Shopify is a bit weird in that the CEO Tobi has controlling shares in the company. Short of embezzlement or intentionally destructive behavior he's effectively unaccountable to anyone but his own stock portfolio.
      - waboremo 3y ago
        Important to note, Tobi's controlling share was voted upon.
judge2020 3y ago
> they'd taken this text and asked GPT-4 to rewrite it in a compassionate tone they'd have got a better result Today, we're making some substantial changes at Shopify, all with the aim of focusing more intently on our mission. We believe these adjustments will help us better serve our community and we're excited about the journey ahead.
fierro 3y ago
I agree; there many odd writing choices. For example, this is a very confusing end to the first sentence: > to pay unshared attention to our mission ...unshared attention?
- JanMa 3y ago
  This might be a bad direct translation from the German saying "ungeteilte Aufmerksamkeit" which can also be translated as "undivided attention"
mabbo 3y ago
As someone who was laid off by Shopify today, I can say this: the document was written well for the audience it was meant for. It was genuinely Tobi. That's how he talks and writes. That's exactly the analogies he would use. No PR person anywhere would write this letter for him. Also, he is wildly obsessed with LLMs. I would place a large money bet that he did have GPT help him edit this document.

nickstinemates 3y ago

It's written like a prologue for an RPG. Main Quest, Side Quest, Crafters... that's dedication.

fmajid 3y ago
To prove it was not written by ChatGPT because no AI is that psychotic, not even SkyNet?
bartread 3y ago
It is indeed. Not my bag at all but I've edited my original comment because a lot of the stuff further down, RPG references aside, is decently written, and there clearly is some compassion there. Severance terms are, as these things go, generous as well, and certainly a lot more than many companies would have done.
jkestner 3y ago
Not going to defend it, but apparently gaming vernacular is a company thing: https://techcrunch.com/2023/05/04/how-shopify-bungled-its-latest-layoffs-and-made-employees-feel-like-npcs/ https://techcrunch.com/2023/05/04/how-shopify-bungled-its-la...
- nickstinemates 3y ago
  To be fair, it shows some character/culture/? which makes it stand apart from all of the other corporate releases out there. If it were good news it'd certainly hit different.

mbesto 3y ago

> Why do companies write like this? It's just awful. You aren't the audience, that's why.

nsoldiac 3y ago
This. Not to say companies always get comms right, quite the opposite, but there's entire org structures filled with people dedicated to crafting these communications and the decisions about wording and audience are probably debated to death internally. My personal hell, but I have to acknowledge it's existence and purpose.
azemetre 3y ago
Who honestly is the audience? Algo traders (not joking here)?
- mbesto 3y ago
  It's a publicly traded company - mainly investors/analysts.
AlbertCory 3y ago
I don't know; every time one of these corpy announcements comes out, I check to see if I have Bingo: https://1fish2.github.io/buzzword-bingo/corp-bingo.html https://1fish2.github.io/buzzword-bingo/corp-bingo.html none yet. Jerry's working on adding weights to the buzzwords.

mikeryan 3y ago

This looks worse out of context. The next sentence is pretty clear on what's going on. There are a number of consequences to this, and I don’t want to bury the lede: after today Shopify will be smaller by about 20% and Flexport will buy Shopify Logistics; this means some of you will leave Shopify today

agluszak 3y ago
> Shopify will be smaller by about 20% So are they going to fire 20% of the C-suite and upper management as well? :)
- mumin 3y ago
  [flagged]
- steve_adams_86 3y ago
  No, they're the heroes going on the main quest!
- deltree7 3y ago
  C-Suite are appointed by the Board. If the board thinks they are not doing their job, they will be fired. How is it not difficult to understand for a self-appointed smart crowd?
  - d4mi3n 3y ago
    Shopify is a bit weird in that the CEO Tobi has controlling shares in the company. Short of embezzlement or intentionally destructive behavior he's effectively unaccountable to anyone but his own stock portfolio.
    - waboremo 3y ago
      Important to note, Tobi's controlling share was voted upon.

judge2020 3y ago

> they'd taken this text and asked GPT-4 to rewrite it in a compassionate tone they'd have got a better result Today, we're making some substantial changes at Shopify, all with the aim of focusing more intently on our mission. We believe these adjustments will help us better serve our community and we're excited about the journey ahead.

fierro 3y ago

I agree; there many odd writing choices. For example, this is a very confusing end to the first sentence: > to pay unshared attention to our mission ...unshared attention?

JanMa 3y ago
This might be a bad direct translation from the German saying "ungeteilte Aufmerksamkeit" which can also be translated as "undivided attention"

mabbo 3y ago

As someone who was laid off by Shopify today, I can say this: the document was written well for the audience it was meant for. It was genuinely Tobi. That's how he talks and writes. That's exactly the analogies he would use. No PR person anywhere would write this letter for him. Also, he is wildly obsessed with LLMs. I would place a large money bet that he did have GPT help him edit this document.