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I have a behaviour that some people have said is weird. I rarely hold on to friends when I change locales. Once in university, I had none of my high school fr

I have a behaviour that some people have said is weird. I rarely hold on to friends when I change locales. Once in university, I had none of my high school friends within a year. Once I graduated, I had almost none of my university friends within a year. I just make friends with whoever is nearby. People I work with. Neighbours. People from the Curling club. I don't really feel anything about it, positive or negative. If someone puts effort into preserving the friendship, I commit equal effort... though as adults with kids, it rarely works out. I guess for me, the actual individuals I'm friends with is not the invariant.

dougmwne 4y ago
I think the way you frame this is probably weird, but the actual behavior is completely normal. Most people would say that they care about their friends from previous phases of their life, but most social research says that friends rarely survive the transition from one stage or location to the next. For friends, proximity is king. I would frame this that I have much love for these people, but that we are on different paths for awhile. Several times our paths have come back together and I have cherished the renewed connection. Sometimes the paths never cross again. I recently learned of two mentors and friends who were very important to me passing away. Our time together was 10 and 20 years ago respectively and we hadn’t kept in touch. I have regretful feelings about this, but also acceptance that our lives were only going to be parallel for a limited time.
- fortuna86 4y ago
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