4 ms·
I just came back from Vietnam and I noticed that many Western countries lack low intensity socialising. There are tea carts everywhere. People sit, sip tea or s
by enaaem 4y ago
I just came back from Vietnam and I noticed that many Western countries lack low intensity socialising. There are tea carts everywhere. People sit, sip tea or some other light beverage and just do nothing. They’re close to others who are also doing nothing with whom they may or may not engage with.
Bars and clubs are too intense, too expensive and unappealing if you don’t drink alcohol. At libraries and coffeeshops people are often busy.
- nicbou 4y agoMost of Europe has a café culture. It is sorely missing from North America. You just sit outside and watch the world go by. Berlin in particular has lots of parks, and people can go there with drinks, grills, frisbees etc. The sheer number of them means that most people are within walking distance from one. It’s great to meet without spending money. Again, those are almost absent in most of North America. You have to drive to them, so they’re inaccessible to kids. My hometown made loitering almost illegal in them anyway.
- OJFord 4y agoIllegal to 'loiter' in a park? What does legal use of it look like? Moving through at a swift pace with eyes straight ahead and a stamped permit that it's the most efficient path to your destination?
- mantas 4y agoHustle! Hustle everywhere!
- i80and 4y agoMy personal* experience is that in areas of the US where real estate is highly valued, there's a low level resentment of anybody existing without having an intent to spend money. Parks are tolerated, but the expectation is that they're purely cosmetic, to be walked through at the very most. * My experience is not universal and is just that: my personal experience.
- amalcon 4y agoIt's a delayed vestige of the "stranger danger" panic of the 80's and 90's. Being in a park without kids is considered suspicious in some places now. Fortunately, not where I live.
- vineyardmike 4y agoIt’s also a subtle way to punish poor people. Obviously it impacts the homeless, but even poorer people without yards or adequate access to private space to play/relax will be forced to loiter in public to get out of the house.
- mantas 4y agoMore like sit and scroll on your phone... :D I love the idea of what cafes were supposed to be a century ago. But nowadays HN or some subreddits plays the same role. Now I can live in bum-fuck-nowhere and interact with other people from wherever. While saving on exorbitant rent just to be close to meeting points. On other other hand, this kills the romanticised idea of the cities. But are we after „city life“ as a cargo cult? Or exchange of ideas? Internet enables later from even most remote points of the world. While former feels more like roleplaying nowadays. Community building is slightly different from cafe culture though. Cafes culture is similar to social media bubbles. Community that connects people physically living in the same people allowing to solve practical problems of the day is needed one way or another.
- nicbou 4y agoIf you think that meeting someone over drinks is equivalent to exchanging a few comments asynchronously, one of us is blissfully unware that they're missing out. Café culture simply means that you have a convenient place to meet with other people with some regularity. You really don't need to be judgemental and dismissive about it.
- mantas 4y agoI see two faces of it. One is meeting local people as in building local community and fulfilling socialising bar for yourself. Another is collaborating on ideas long-term. Those are very different. For me the most valuable part is the later. And interwebs do wonders in this space. Same conversions IRL may have been nicer, but there's no way I could have been part of them (or at least so many of them) otherwise. And if you're in a crowded cafe watching a famous person... It's not 1-on-1 conversation either, much closer to Reddit's AmA thread... As for building local community... IMO Cafes are too restrictive. A decent community space wins all day any day.
- nicbou 4y agoI'm saying that most of Europe has access to such spaces, and that they serve an important purpose. It's a good place for loosely planned social encounters. Whether or not you personally like them is irrelevant. > And if you're in a crowded cafe watching a famous person You can go to another café
- treis 4y agoYou think parks are "almost absent" in North America?
- yunwal 4y agoI feel like parks in most of the U.S. are dominated by activities. Sports, jungle gyms, etc. Often times there’s not a great place to just sit down and socialize.
- anthonypasq 4y agoevery single park ive ever been to does in fact have this weird little thing called grass
- yunwal 4y agoBut there's also the sprinklers that go off every minute to keep the grass looking healthy so no one can sit on it. Or the grass is part of the baseball field. Plenty of good parks in the US for hanging out but wayyy more bad ones where just socializing seems like an afterthought, or not a thought at all.
- mrguyorama 4y agoNah there's still plenty of "An area that's mostly nature and you can just walk through and enjoy it" but the vast majority of them were set up a hundred years ago so the reality is that most of them aren't even remotely close to population centers anymore. This means if you want to walk in a park, first you must drive there. Also in many places, staying past sundown is not allowed, as in the cops drive in (like they will actually drive around on the grass if they physically can!!) and sass you.
- yunwal 4y agoYeah obviously the US is huge and there’s plenty of nature to be found, but somehow we’ve just forgotten to integrate that into our communities and walkable areas completely.