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> We're talking about the kind of individual who, for example, got a bad review from a manager years ago and can't let it go. I’m not that person, but I have h
by sammalloy 4y ago
> We're talking about the kind of individual who, for example, got a bad review from a manager years ago and can't let it go.
I’m not that person, but I have had something similar happen to me in an altogether different way. Instead of ruminating on an event like you describe, I will have very minor episodes of spontaneous, percolating memories—very old memories-that come out of nowhere like Proust’s madeleine moment, and it’s incredibly off-putting. Does anyone else experience these random memories popping up out of nowhere in the middle of their day?
- lobsterthief 4y agoThat happens to me all the time. For me, it’s almost like deja vu, where small combinations of what I’m currently doing causes a memory to pop into my head. Sometimes it seems to happen with no external stimuli. Honestly, what I’ve found helps is to embrace it and consciously focus on the memory. Try to stop thinking of it as off-putting and let your brain explore the memory and really think about it. I see it as a cool sort of gift where you can relive things to ponder them further, even when the memories aren’t the happiest. Something I learned in therapy: if you push it off and try to ignore it, it will keep coming back. It’s like your brain has unfinished business, and when you push it away and say “don’t think about that”, your brain starts associating whatever that thing is with negativity. I’m no therapist, and you and I are different people, but it’s possible this is why you see it as off-putting and I don’t.