3 ms·
To be fair... There are at least... 3... Animals here that aren't explicitly trying to kill us. It's really not that bad. Just don't go into the warm water or
by llamaLord 4y ago
To be fair... There are at least... 3... Animals here that aren't explicitly trying to kill us. It's really not that bad.
Just don't go into the warm water or the box jellyfish will get you. Keep an eye out for Sting-rays too... Nobody wants to go out like old-mate Steve.
Oh and don't go into the cold water either, blue-ringed octopus... Nasty buggers.
Rivers too... Not a great idea... Crocks are pretty nippy when they're hungry.
Creeks are pretty safe... Except for those duck-billed, beaver looking mother-fuckers with their poisonous spurs everywhere... (platypus).
Best to avoid the dessert too... Taipan's are pretty nasty. Oh and the fire ants...
Come to think of it, the bush has Tiger Snakes... Probably should avoid that too... Just stay at home...
... Oh... And keep an eye out for the spiders... They really like being indoors where you sleep... Will also kill you...
The main thing to remember though... The true threat... Our sworn enemy for all eternity... Our nations true oppressors... Those fucking Emus.
- ndsipa_pomu 4y agoYou missed out the deadly drop-bears
- llamaLord 4y agoAnd the Combat-Emu https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cassowary https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cassowary
- techdragon 4y agonever heard it called a combat emu… But also, these guys are like… A+ proof of dinosaur’s evolution into birds… you can pretty much picture Cassowaries in place of the raptors in Jurassic park… Some extra Cassowary info. https://www.australiangeographic.com.au/topics/wildlife/2019/10/jungle-royalty-the-enigmatic-cassowary/ https://www.australiangeographic.com.au/topics/wildlife/2019... https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/tetrapod-zoology/how-dangerous-are-cassowaries-really/ https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/tetrapod-zoology/how-da...
- llamaLord 4y ago"Combat Emu" is my personal contribution to the Aussie lexicon (at least as far as I'm aware). I figured it's appropriate...
- zabzonk 4y agoluckily, the really deadly cassaworys have not yet learned to swim
- mojo74 4y agoAnd forgotten how to fly
- zabzonk 4y agoshould have thought of that :-) annecdote: i once went for a job at edinburgh university zoology department (i would have been about 19 at the time), and was confronted with a mostly disected mess. interviewer: what do you make of that? me: it looks like a badly disected cassowary. it was a cassowary (where from, who knows - they don't roam wild on arthur seat) and i didn't get the job (good).
- salgernon 4y agoI love Terry Pratchett’s description of XXXX - the Australian analogue in his book “The Last Continent”. While a book on deadly native animals would encompass several volumes, the “book” of safe animals was a single page that listed “some of the sheep.”
- nirav72 4y agoDon’t forget the dangerous snails. https://www.jcu.edu.au/this-is-uni/natural-and-built-environments/articles/killer-snails-working-with-deadly-sea-creatures https://www.jcu.edu.au/this-is-uni/natural-and-built-environ...
- llamaLord 4y agoOh one really important one I forgot to mention... The Eagles that LITERALLY RAIN FIRE FROM THE SKY... https://www.nine.com.au/entertainment/viral/australian-birds-spreading-fire-catch-prey/a6f2efdc-25b1-4ff9-b50e-5b9a79ef86a3 https://www.nine.com.au/entertainment/viral/australian-birds...