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> Also, this is a bit off topic but does anyone else feel that relationship quality on a societal level has gone down a lot? I feel that the majority of relatio

> Also, this is a bit off topic but does anyone else feel that relationship quality on a societal level has gone down a lot? I feel that the majority of relationships and marriages say 60-70 years ago were happy and mutually fulfilling, but now anecdotally it seems that most people are not happy whatsoever. I think this is a symptom, not a cause. Personal and economic atomization is largely outside an individual's control, unless they are making Fat Stacks Of Cash. I can't speak to Japan, but I can to what I've seen here in the United States. There are people for whom the trends of moving further away from home have significant benefits--and I as a younger man was one of them, both for social and economic reasons. But they, along with the generally increased precariousness of what used to be a "middle class" and increased reliance on the information economy, are strong pressures towards personal atomization. "Both my girlfriend and I need to work to advance in our careers to become less precarious, but one or the other of us might have to move really far away and stop seeing each other" necessarily reduces investment in other people, at least a little bit. (This isn't saying dual-income situations or women with careers are a negative; far from it. The first weirdo to go on about "men were hunter-gatherers so of course their careers matter more" or whatever can get bopped.) You see the same with friend groups. The friends I primarily knew online are the friends I stay more closely in touch with, because we're still in the same hangouts when one or the other has moved further away. The forces that are out of your control and thus able to pull you away from your social moorings are stronger now than in the past, and the natural coping mechanism for most people is to connect less. I think it's natural for people who feel less connected and increasingly economically vulnerable to be "not happy whatsoever". It is only in the last few years, where I have managed some level of personal wealth (and not just income), that I've been able to entertain putting down roots, and feel more at ease and happier.

kodah 4y ago
I have different degrees of friendships and people move in and out of them. I don't even really actively think about them; the level of friendship at the time largely relies on availability overlap, personal life experience overlap, and other factors. These things, like you mentioned, are more fluid these days. I also think people are more accepting of social reclusion in the information age. It used to be some kind of red flag that very social people would use to wallop non-social people. It took the aggressiveness that people who prefer working in an office often show to remote workers. These kind of societal evolutions will also influence the normalcy of behavior as experiences become more ubiquitous. More people have experienced loss, financial strain, etc

kodah 4y ago

I have different degrees of friendships and people move in and out of them. I don't even really actively think about them; the level of friendship at the time largely relies on availability overlap, personal life experience overlap, and other factors. These things, like you mentioned, are more fluid these days. I also think people are more accepting of social reclusion in the information age. It used to be some kind of red flag that very social people would use to wallop non-social people. It took the aggressiveness that people who prefer working in an office often show to remote workers. These kind of societal evolutions will also influence the normalcy of behavior as experiences become more ubiquitous. More people have experienced loss, financial strain, etc