5 ms·

I'm going off the tangent here. While we're near the topic, I kind of need a AITA style judgment. A friend of mine felt it was finger-pointing when her coworke

I'm going off the tangent here. While we're near the topic, I kind of need a AITA style judgment. A friend of mine felt it was finger-pointing when her coworker said "could you take a look at your commit `abc0123`? because it broke the test `Xyz`". When I saw the screenshot I thought it was direct but professional. My opinion was dismissed because "yeah you think so because you're a bit socially awkward too"

nordsieck 4y ago
> A friend of mine felt it was finger pointing when her coworker said "could you take a look at your commit `abc0123`? because it broke the test `Xyz`". I thought it was direct but professional. IMO, it was appropriately finger pointing. The person who breaks the build should be the one to fix it - they're the one with the most context. But also - require tests to pass before a commit is allowed. It makes development so much better.
- ackfoobar 4y ago
  > require tests to pass before a commit is allowed Agreed. I did not dig for the deeper context, their org is probably quite dysfunctional.
- foobazgt 4y ago
  I've softened my language a bit over the years from approximately that to something more like: "Hey, I think commit abc0123 might have broken the build, and it looks like it was yours (link to build results). Would you mind looking at it?" I give myself a little room for being wrong (sometimes I am), and it comes across as being less of an ass, to which people generally respond positively.
- bluefirebrand 4y ago
  Requiring tests to pass before a commit is allowed can be a negative experience as well. For instance if you're handing off a branch to someone else to take over work in progress because you're going on vacation. Or if you just have the (good) habit of checking in your work in progress code frequently, or daily. Or if you have several workstations you want to share code on. Point is that commits should be frequent and requiring tests to pass before you can commit is guaranteed to make sure that commits are infrequent. I prefer to put "tests must pass before PR can be merged", rather than before commits can be made. It solves all of those issues.
  - nordsieck 4y ago
    > I prefer to put "tests must pass before PR can be merged", rather than before commits can be made. I worded it poorly, but this is largely what I meant. Although I was trying to stick to commits on main/master for the repository of record since PRs are a github (and bitbucket?) thing, whereas pre-commit hooks are a git thing.
muh_gradle 4y ago
Context is important. There's a way to say that nicely like sending that person a DM to let them know. And then maybe send a note to the team chat if the rest of the team need to know and it would be a blocker. But your friend should also have less of an ego about it and accept responsibility. That being said, I've been in team environments where the language felt personal and like I was being thrown under the bus unnecessarily. So I've been on both sides.
- ackfoobar 4y ago
  As far as I can tell that is 1-1 DM.
deebosong 4y ago
This is just my take, but if the person being rightfully called-out is claiming you are socially awkward, that to me seems a bit tactless, unnecessarily defensive (in the emotionally immature sense), and kinda hypocritical. But hey, I don't know the full story, wasn't there, and don't know the stakes. Might just be the way I see things, though.
- ackfoobar 4y ago
  We know each other long enough that I don't mind her claiming that I'm socially awkward. It's true after all. But I agree with the rest of your take.
DoreenMichele 4y ago
If I'm following this correctly, they asked your opinion and then were dismissive of it "because you're socially awkward." If so, they're the assholes. Surely, they knew you were socially awkward before they asked.
- ackfoobar 4y ago
  Sorry for being unclear. When I wrote "AITA style judgment", I wasn't particularly asking about the interaction between me and her. But if you find that important, my opinion was unsolicited. She ranted about the coworker in a fb story. I found that unfair and shot her a message.
  - midoridensha 4y ago
    >She ranted about the coworker in a fb story. I found that unfair and shot her a message. That's not just unfair, that's horribly unprofessional.
deleted 4y ago
[deleted]
turtleyacht 4y ago
I send screenshots all the time, though. I feel like it's helpful. But I agree else-thread [1] that "word padding" helps soften what the other may (depending on mood, time of day, kids yelling, and Oh God I am this close to sending up this PR if I can just have time to think) misinterpret and become agitated by. I think you're fortunate to have someone be able to tell you stuff like that without it offending you [2]. Maybe she needed to vent a little. It's nice to have someone to vent to (within limits). In a week or so she might come around and agree, yeah we shouldn't break the build--but at the time it was annoying to be told that (due to tone or whatever reason). [1] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=35367231 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=35367231 [2] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=35366694 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=35366694

nordsieck 4y ago

> A friend of mine felt it was finger pointing when her coworker said "could you take a look at your commit `abc0123`? because it broke the test `Xyz`". I thought it was direct but professional. IMO, it was appropriately finger pointing. The person who breaks the build should be the one to fix it - they're the one with the most context. But also - require tests to pass before a commit is allowed. It makes development so much better.

ackfoobar 4y ago
> require tests to pass before a commit is allowed Agreed. I did not dig for the deeper context, their org is probably quite dysfunctional.
foobazgt 4y ago
I've softened my language a bit over the years from approximately that to something more like: "Hey, I think commit abc0123 might have broken the build, and it looks like it was yours (link to build results). Would you mind looking at it?" I give myself a little room for being wrong (sometimes I am), and it comes across as being less of an ass, to which people generally respond positively.
bluefirebrand 4y ago
Requiring tests to pass before a commit is allowed can be a negative experience as well. For instance if you're handing off a branch to someone else to take over work in progress because you're going on vacation. Or if you just have the (good) habit of checking in your work in progress code frequently, or daily. Or if you have several workstations you want to share code on. Point is that commits should be frequent and requiring tests to pass before you can commit is guaranteed to make sure that commits are infrequent. I prefer to put "tests must pass before PR can be merged", rather than before commits can be made. It solves all of those issues.
- nordsieck 4y ago
  > I prefer to put "tests must pass before PR can be merged", rather than before commits can be made. I worded it poorly, but this is largely what I meant. Although I was trying to stick to commits on main/master for the repository of record since PRs are a github (and bitbucket?) thing, whereas pre-commit hooks are a git thing.

muh_gradle 4y ago

Context is important. There's a way to say that nicely like sending that person a DM to let them know. And then maybe send a note to the team chat if the rest of the team need to know and it would be a blocker. But your friend should also have less of an ego about it and accept responsibility. That being said, I've been in team environments where the language felt personal and like I was being thrown under the bus unnecessarily. So I've been on both sides.

ackfoobar 4y ago
As far as I can tell that is 1-1 DM.

deebosong 4y ago

This is just my take, but if the person being rightfully called-out is claiming you are socially awkward, that to me seems a bit tactless, unnecessarily defensive (in the emotionally immature sense), and kinda hypocritical. But hey, I don't know the full story, wasn't there, and don't know the stakes. Might just be the way I see things, though.

ackfoobar 4y ago
We know each other long enough that I don't mind her claiming that I'm socially awkward. It's true after all. But I agree with the rest of your take.

DoreenMichele 4y ago

If I'm following this correctly, they asked your opinion and then were dismissive of it "because you're socially awkward." If so, they're the assholes. Surely, they knew you were socially awkward before they asked.

ackfoobar 4y ago
Sorry for being unclear. When I wrote "AITA style judgment", I wasn't particularly asking about the interaction between me and her. But if you find that important, my opinion was unsolicited. She ranted about the coworker in a fb story. I found that unfair and shot her a message.
- midoridensha 4y ago
  >She ranted about the coworker in a fb story. I found that unfair and shot her a message. That's not just unfair, that's horribly unprofessional.

deleted 4y ago

[deleted]

turtleyacht 4y ago

I send screenshots all the time, though. I feel like it's helpful. But I agree else-thread [1] that "word padding" helps soften what the other may (depending on mood, time of day, kids yelling, and Oh God I am this close to sending up this PR if I can just have time to think) misinterpret and become agitated by. I think you're fortunate to have someone be able to tell you stuff like that without it offending you [2]. Maybe she needed to vent a little. It's nice to have someone to vent to (within limits). In a week or so she might come around and agree, yeah we shouldn't break the build--but at the time it was annoying to be told that (due to tone or whatever reason). [1] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=35367231 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=35367231 [2] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=35366694 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=35366694