4 ms·
Maybe jerks get further ahead in life than "nice guys". Maybe they are in wealthier, more powerful and have more sex. And maybe they find person after person th
by funnym0nk3y 4y ago
Maybe jerks get further ahead in life than "nice guys". Maybe they are in wealthier, more powerful and have more sex. And maybe they find person after person they can use to get ahead.
But they constantly need to steer themselves and others. They can't have loving, caring and trusting relationships with people. They can't trust to be liked no matter what. In the same way they use people to get ahead, they themselves get left behind the moment they don't perform. This puts an immense pressure on them, and to put it in the words of the article, they are at war their whole life.
I'd totally trade money and status for not fighting my whole life.
- riku_iki 4y agothey totally can love, be loyal, loved and trusted by their inner circle(family), while being jerks in external environment.
- juvvel 4y agoI have been with such a person and I can tell you the cognitive dissonance of that life weighed on them and made them generally unpleasant in many ways.
- funnym0nk3y 4y agoThey can, yes. The question is, however, what their natural behaviour is. Are they generally nice people and act like jerks just to get ahead? Or are they jerks and need to keep it together with family, friends, etc? Either way, in one part of their life they need to behave against their nature.
- riku_iki 4y agonatural behavior for example can be to love and help close people but realize that world around is competitive and everyone tries to bite everyone. I also think "jerk" assessment comes from people who do not accept such world, do not want to compete and prefer to be in the comfort zone, and blame surrounding instead by calling names.