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I’m a fairly new father. It was hard fought for my wife and I. Three years of trying, rounds of IUI, I had to be on different medications that entire 3+ that ma

I’m a fairly new father. It was hard fought for my wife and I. Three years of trying, rounds of IUI, I had to be on different medications that entire 3+ that made me feel shitty, and eventually we succeeded with our first round of IVF. We now have an 18 month old daughter, and we just tried with one of our frozen embryos to get her a sister. I say tried because while my wife got pregnant, we found out a few days ago that it was an anembryonic gestation. My wife passed what embryo there was today. We aren’t exactly rich and my parents helped with the funds. But you know what? It’s all been worth it. Hell, I’ve been stressed like crazy because I want to change careers back to using my degree in computer science instead of the photography I’ve been doing and I don’t have the time to get my skills up to snuff because of her… But my daughter makes me the happiest I’ve ever been in my life. It’s a joy I never had before. I wish I could somehow let my friends that have decided not to have children experience it.

soderfoo 4y ago
So sorry for your loss. Regarding wanting to get back in to CS: I became a dev in my mid 30s, and found my first job in a country where I don't speak the language. Received plenty of rejections and embarrassed myself during both whiteboard and take home coding challenges. Even when I went above and beyond for a take home challenge, the offer went to someone else. But something stuck out to the hiring director (grit, belligerence in the face of the odds?) and I was offered a position mainly on my intangibles. Sometimes I tend over think and catastrophize, but every now and then I catch lightning in a bottle and defiantly ignore that skeptical voice. So I hope you can take something from my rant.
- Auracle 4y ago
  Thank you. It's a bit hard in my case as we want to stay in our rural area, so that would mean probably a remote job. What's worse is that weddings are booked pretty far out, so I would need to not take any (more) bookings for 2024 and desperately hope I can get a job after wedding season is done in November. There's no way I could take on a full time job in addition to a full summer's worth of weddings. I work 15 or so hours a day during the worst of it already. I've been working on a VR game in my free time so right now my hope is to (somehow) finish that this year and then at least I'll have something to show...which I guess might be that lightning in a bottle that I need.
rayiner 4y ago
Congratulations on your baby daughter!
- Auracle 4y ago
  Thank you!

soderfoo 4y ago

So sorry for your loss. Regarding wanting to get back in to CS: I became a dev in my mid 30s, and found my first job in a country where I don't speak the language. Received plenty of rejections and embarrassed myself during both whiteboard and take home coding challenges. Even when I went above and beyond for a take home challenge, the offer went to someone else. But something stuck out to the hiring director (grit, belligerence in the face of the odds?) and I was offered a position mainly on my intangibles. Sometimes I tend over think and catastrophize, but every now and then I catch lightning in a bottle and defiantly ignore that skeptical voice. So I hope you can take something from my rant.

Auracle 4y ago
Thank you. It's a bit hard in my case as we want to stay in our rural area, so that would mean probably a remote job. What's worse is that weddings are booked pretty far out, so I would need to not take any (more) bookings for 2024 and desperately hope I can get a job after wedding season is done in November. There's no way I could take on a full time job in addition to a full summer's worth of weddings. I work 15 or so hours a day during the worst of it already. I've been working on a VR game in my free time so right now my hope is to (somehow) finish that this year and then at least I'll have something to show...which I guess might be that lightning in a bottle that I need.

rayiner 4y ago

Congratulations on your baby daughter!

Auracle 4y ago
Thank you!