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I remember being laughed at by my English peers for having an arranged marriage. I was effectively speed dated through many girls and we got to find each other
by amriksohata 4y ago
I remember being laughed at by my English peers for having an arranged marriage. I was effectively speed dated through many girls and we got to find each other quickly without the pain of being "dumped" or spending years with the wrong person.
Now looking at the success rate of those same peers (or failure rate) and divorces etc., I realised my low expectation marriage, married with someone of common interests to me has so much more value than dating dozens of random women for years and years never to actually find the one.
- em-bee 4y agoseems you still got to choose among a selection of people. even if that selection was curated by someone. you found someone with common interests. in a strict arranged marriage neither partner has a choice and any compatibility is pure luck. if people are laughing, it's because they think that is what happened.
- amriksohata 4y agoYes selection of people, but with the focus of family at heart, marrying into a family but also bought up the same way with the same expectations of role and duty towards children as the first priority, not careers or "ohh i want to go travelling". You are expected to be a mature adult with responsibilities when married. Rather than individuals going on dates and telling their family a few months later when they have found the one. Its far more serious, cuts out all the time wasters on both sides and you have to be 100% open and upfront about everything, its honest and transparent. Whilst I have seen stories have people finding out their partner was completely different to what they told earlier.