Because magic isn't real and hoarders are people whose mental illness compels them to live in filth. We've finally grown out of applying the "noble savage" myth

Because magic isn't real and hoarders are people whose mental illness compels them to live in filth. We've finally grown out of applying the "noble savage" myth to aboriginal peoples only to turn around and apply it to anyone with a damaged mind. The five hundred boxes of dried-out ink pens are not reaching out to you through the luminiferous aether, you just need therapy.